much ado about rien

ok, it has been a while. if i make some mistakes here it is bc of the french keyboard i am using at work. as some of y'all may know, my computer cord died. yes, the elecricity surged and my cord was plugged in...leading to explosion and dead cord. luckily my computer wasn't actually plugged in at the time...so i am entrain de waiting for a new one from dad...and apparently there are also dark chocolate peanut m&ms in the package; score. on the subject of packages; no i have not received yours; anyone's. i am going to the nati workstation soon and i will hopefully have a nice pile waiting.

Just for kicks, here is what it looks like if i type without cherching for the correct keys:

i just typed like q hourùs zorth of ,qteriql qnd of course none of it zqs sqved:::so i q, going to try to not throz q fit qnd just cql,ly try to re,e,ber zhqt i typed here qnd hope thqt i donùt throz so,ething out the zindoz in frustrqtion:

so i cannot really remember what i had written here...i have typed for an hour and published it and of course it didn't work for wharever stupid reason. aaargh, i guess i'll just give a mini update.

i have been running, i made a beninese friend who runs with me and helps me with my french...which has gotten a lot better, but still needs a lot of work. i have read like twenty different books including all the twilights, a david sedaris, some robin cook, a little john irving, a book about running, and a lot of my pathology textbook. i thought maybe not having a computer would induce some sort of ascetic like revelation about the spirit sucking technology dependant, but honestly i am just really missing watching californication and other movies. i LIKE technology, i like the internet; i like being connected to the world. give me an iphone or give me death!

as far as work goes, i still do a lot of sitting and waiting. i'm trying to not let it get to me; it's pretty typical for the first few months at post. i've been reqding my pathology book at work and people just say ''good work!'' whenever they walk by. i also spend a couple days at the maternité and hopefully i'll be helping out with births in a few weeks. the sage-femme (mid-wife) doesn't really know what to do with me; i'm not a nurse or doctor and can't speak particularly good french. hopefully that will get better as they get used to me hanging around.

i had been doing a lot of cooking, but i've been eating out a lot more. the wagasi on the streets is just so much better than i can make it especially with yam pilée and the couscous qnd omelette plate at this one cafetariat in town is fabulous. i have also discovered watchi, this delicious rice and beans combo that combined with savory wagasi is soooo freaking good. since i've been cooking for myself less i've naturally been sick a lot more. in the last month i've been sick enough for cipro at least twice although i think it's from the same salad place that got me sick on post visit. i'm going to keep eating out, but not go there and see how i do. since i'm all out of cipro now...seems like a good time.

i'm writing more since i am sans computer, working on my YA novel about fairies that i started last fall in my writing for children class. it so far has a suspiciously twilight tinged feel to it, but hopefully once i transcribe it to computer i can edit a bit of that out. i am writing in these little 80 page cahiers that are gridded like for geometry or high school chem and really hating the shitty cheap pens that are so ubiquitous here. someone please send me those four-in-one bic pens. they are my favorite and remind me of taking notes in organic chem and genetics.

i saw a facebook event ad for the wellesley sex carnival tomorrow and felt a surge of pride that the tradition continues. my beninese friend would pee her pants if she heard about that, haha.

well, i think that's it for now; i am really getting tired of this keyboard. i have a couple insanely cynical and depressing entries that i've written in the cahiers, but i think i'll save them for later. right now i am looking forward to some couscous, omelettes, and fries and life is good.

i miss and love you all, please send chocolate.

e

Just a Tuesday Morning Development Discussion

October 5, 2010

I am having a conversation with Alain, a work partner here at PSI and he is trying to speak English. It is not easy to understand and we are both trying to get connected to the wifi in the office that has been spotty for the last few days. I wish that the air conditioner was turned on, but they never have it on in the mornings.

“It is not very fast,” he says slowly, deliberately, typing something on his laptop.

“Well, this is Africa.” I smile when I say it, teasing, but I am frustrated. Immediately I regret the comment as his eyebrows raise, surprised. He smiles back, but there is tension now.

“It is always fast in America?” He doesn’t look at me.

“Oui.” There is a long moment of silence, something that has just started getting less awkward for me, but now I feel like my months of habituation haven’t happened.

And then: “Tell me why you are here. What are your ideas to help the development of Africa.” He smiles when he asks, but I can feel the anticipation filling the space between us. I don’t know how to answer anymore. If he had asked me months ago I would have said something about providing my time and skills to the people here to help them help themselves, but honestly I have not felt particularly useful in weeks.

When I got here I thought that my idealism was held in check. I thought of myself as someone who was skeptical of the whole idea of aid work and that I had read enough so that naïveté was the last thing I brought with me. Well, it wasn’t true. I don’t think I was lying to myself exactly, but I was definitely clouding some truths about what I wanted to accomplish here. I would have thought that I could answer a simple question about what I hope to do here for the next two years.

But I don’t have any answers and that sounds so cynical it makes my stomach hurt.

Natitangou

October 3, 2010

I just got back from Natitangou and I tell ya, it is freaking gorgeous up there. I can see why it is the primary place of tourism in this country. The entire city is surrounded by these majestic hills that the sun sets behind. There is this restaurant that is up on one of the hills and were we went to dinner (and lunch the next day!); you could see the entire city and the stars from up there. I am definitely taking colt there on a date one night; it’s easily the prettiest place I’ve seen in Africa thus far. And the food was damn good, too…at least by African standards. Frites and I hear the chicken was fantastic (at least for African standards).

Speaking of meat, I have been seriously craving a steak. Like a big, juicy, delicious, expensive steak. I think if someone presented me with one right now all ready to go, I’d probably actually eat it. The problem is that I don’t particularly want to eat any other meat; I don’t want to waste my meat eating on something not good enough…something lame. And since the only place I can get a sufficiently delicious piece of meat is the US of A, I think I will be remaining a vegetarian. And I’m also going to cherche some more sources of protein because I think I’m probably not getting enough since I’m legit having intense cravings for steak!

Right now I am downloading like a million movies from another volunteer and I am super psyched about it. I will have all the Harry Potters and Back to the Futures and I am also getting more 6 feet under so I can finally finish the series in peace even though mom ruined it for me last year. I’m also going to get caught up on 30 Rock and Entourage and I might watch Californication…all of that after I finish season 3 of Dexter. I definitely did not expect to be watching this much television in Africa…hmmmm.

Ok….well, that’s pretty much it for now. I’ll definitely update soon if anything actually interesting happens around here! I think I’m headed to the centre de santé tomorrow or Tuesday. Perhaps something cool will go down. I really need something interesting for my medical school personal statement! Haha

E