Peace Corps Reform

There is little doubt that the Peace Corps is a valued and respected organization. For fifty years, volunteers have impacted the world and served as beacons of American altruism. The organization as a whole has often been above reproach, a legacy of the Kennedy administration, and returned volunteers and currently serving volunteers alike shy away from criticizing the agency that has been such a huge part of their lives. This is starting to change, and rightly so. If the Peace Corps wants to stay relevant for another 50 years, it has a long way to go.

A recent article describes many of the challenges facing the agency and many of the questions that must be answered. In the article, there is reference to Chuck Ludlam and his wife, Paula Hirschoff, two RPCVs who have taken the lead in the Peace Corps reform action. Their 20 point reform plan calls for budgetary reforms and ways to strengthen the organization (including decreasing the alarming 35% ET rate and plans to achieve sustainable first goal results). They and others are also pushing strongly to get PCVs “whistleblower rights” protecting volunteers when they do speak out. This is, of course, an issue very close to home (literally; Kate’s village, Badjoude, is 30 kilometers away from me). Kate’s death was a direct result of Peace Corps administration not respecting her confidentiality and it never should have happened.

Luckily, many of these reform movements are seeing press. The ABC 20/20 episode about Peace Corps scandals has gotten people talking. Ludlam and Hirschoff have continued speaking out, even if controversial, and I know they are working hard, contacting current volunteers and RPCVs to lend support to reform. The Congressional hearings last month about sexual assault changes in the agency are a step in the right direction, but we need more. I happen to have a few ideas on the subject…

What we don’t need is simply more volunteers. Before we worry about expansion, we need to strengthen. We need better development priorities, sustainable project training. We need better qualified volunteers with more experience. We need to make sure that volunteers are safe and protected, even from the Peace Corps itself. We need better systems for volunteers reporting crimes like sexual assault and rape. We need better training and more resources. Absolutely we need better transparency from the agency and hard-hitting evaluations and feedback. The ET rate is too high, red-tape and country specific bureaucracy lead to tension and frustration for volunteers, our role as a development organization has never been really established, and projects are often unsustainable. We need significant reforms on all levels.

One thing specifically would be more financial support for projects. We as volunteers have to raise money for most of our projects. It would be nice if the Peace Corps as an organization could provide funds for specific ideas. For example, our girls’ camp this month was funded entirely by friends and family in the states. This is a major undertaking that has been successful in this area of Benin for five years and makes a clear and distinctive impact on the community. It is a major project for many of us and yet all the financing is external to the Peace Corps. Another idea, one that Ludlam and Hirschoff agree with, is increased collaboration with larger aid organizations. The Peace Corps is not an aid organization, per se. It’s sort of a mini-aid organization with large cultural and community based exchange aspects. If we were partnered up more frequently with bigger organizations, we could be valuable volunteer workers for developmental aid in a more roundabout way. This is basically what I am doing working with PSI, a large American based international NGO. I am, however, one of only two of us in our 60 member training group who actually works with an organization of this magnitude. And I’m still frustrated with my work a lot of the time.

I initially thought my frustration was only due to the general difficulty of working in development aid in Africa, but that’s just not true. I’m frustrated not only because development work is hard, but because the Peace Corps isn’t really a development organization at all! We don’t have the training or resources to really be effective with international development work. We aren’t really even expected to be. Maybe this realization will help me stop beating myself up about not saving the world. I’m just supposed to experience the world. I’m not sure I accept that, though.

I know that a lot of people value the ambiguous nature of the Peace Corps as more of a cultural exchange program than a development program, but personally, I resent it. I wish the Peace Corps would figure out what we’re really supposed to be doing. If we want to shift work more toward a legitimate development program, we would have a lot of changes to make. Things like data collection, selecting more experienced volunteers, and allowing administrators and managers to work for more than five years would help us look more legit. Of course, not everyone wants this. A lot of people still see the Peace Corps as a time for personal growth, learning a new language, becoming a better citizen of the world, and to a certain degree I totally agree with this. I have already been immensely impacted in how I will approach the world and I know I’ve gotten to know my community much better than the workers in more traditional aid agencies do. I have friends here and am really a part of this place. I’m not sure that would be possible if the Peace Corps was more centralized and focused on development. The fact that Volunteers make the agency what they will is a powerful and romantic idea. We do what we need to do without a set-in-stone mission and there’s something wonderful about that, I agree. But what is it that we really need to do in the world? What is our real goal as an organization? Do we want our tax dollars to go to recent college grads on a two year cultural vacation? We need to figure these things out before we can move forward. And it’s not just me that needs to get thinking; this is something Peace Corps Washington needs to decide.

It has been 50 years. It is time to start asking those penetrating questions. We, as volunteers, as returned volunteers and managers inside the administration, have a unique responsibility to speak up. As Hirschoff and Ludlam say:

“Those of us who revere the Peace Corps should take the lead in asking these questions. Those who care the most…should ask the hardest questions. The Peace Corps is an historic and romantic vestige of the values of the 60s and the New Frontier, but that role is not sufficient to explain and justify its role in the 21st Century. The ultimate act of loyalty to the Peace Corps is to ask the tough questions before outsiders do.” 

So let’s get crackin’. Once again, I really hope I’m not coming across as an anti-Peace Corps volunteer. I know the administration here has my blog address, but I’m not sure how frequently they stop by. Probably not at all (but just in case…hi, guys!). I don’t think my criticisms can be considered inappropriate content and I’ve never had my blog be mentioned to me by anyone in the administration…yet. But I worry about it sometimes. The fact is, we’re not really protected over here and I’ve heard stories of administrative separations (ad-seps) for online content. Granted, those were usually due to country specific political posts, or wildly disrespectful information about the country or the country’s people, but…the fear is there. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter. I won’t be silenced just because I worry about who is listening. I believe I have a right and a responsibility to talk about this stuff, to challenge the organization that I believe in so strongly to become better.

I hope in fifty years there will be someone like me riding around on her hover board (you know, ‘cause it’s the future), making the choice to join a still relevant, still powerful, still life-altering and idealistic Peace Corps. But we have to start now to make that happen.

Sexual Violence and the Peace Corps at 50

This article is a preview of the hearings held by congress today, which can be streamed here.

Kate Puzey's mom, Lois, gave testimony as well, speaking to the need for whistleblower protection and confidentiality breeches leading to her daughter's death. I couldn't watch the video so someone should let me know if anything unexpected or promising occurs. I doubt it will, but I am feeling extremely pessimistic and bitter about the Peace Corps as an organization right now, although I just want to preface this entire post by saying that I love the Peace Corps and simply want it to reach its potential as the force I know it can be, the organization that I believe in. But right now it needs to make some serious changes.

The first time I was made aware of the Peace Corps inappropriate response and attitude toward victims/survivors (I will use the word survivor in my own words and only use "victim" when quoting others) of sexual assault and rape was the third or fourth week of training. We were all gathered at Songhai for our weekly medical training session and most of us were dreading pretty hard the "rape talk." We were actually surprised with it on that Tuesday as we were expecting it the following week. Immediately I knew this was going to be bad. You should never surprise a group of people with a sexual violence discussion because you never know who will be triggered in the audience. That day, someone who needed to avoid the conversation would not have been able to without causing a scene. I was very interested in how they would present the information. As a women's college graduate with a modest but passionate background in women's studies, I was worried about the ability of the male host country national physician employed by PC/Benin to give a sensitive and appropriate talk on the subject. My concerns were, at first, made irrelevant because they showed a video. I thought, "Oh good! The Peace Corps knows that HCN doctors probably aren't the best resources for this information so they've prepared something with a strong survivor-empowering message for us to watch instead." Oh boy was I so wrong. The video very clearly focused on survivor's use of alcohol and culturally inappropriate attire as reasons for getting into risky situations, a clear case of "victim-blaming" that I was disgusted to see from an official Peace Corps Washington video. The rest of the video was similar; women cried and were vague about the help they got from Peace Corps. It was made clear that pursing legal action would be difficult and the primary message was "don't get too close to men and drink too much." I was horrified. When the HCN doctor finally did start talking I was further devastated. There were casual references to rape and assault situations, joking and making light of the video, more victim-blaming, and discouragement for coming forward if anything ever actually happened here.

I excused myself, went to the bathroom, and cried. I was already tired and frustrated with stage (training is just, in general, sort of a frustrating time) and the idea that statistically SOMEONE in the room had experienced an assault or rape and was being forced to listen to this crap was so disheartening I literally couldn't take it. One in four American women has had an experience like that and most of us know what it's like to get close or feel the threat of it and discussions of rape and assault can be extremely triggering and must be treated with respect. Dismissive attitudes of both our facilitator and the video itself were disturbing and so inappropriate for an organization representing America that I had to literally grieve for a few minutes.

I put this information in my training review of course. It was one of the biggest problems I've had with the Peace Corps and since then I've learned increasing amounts of information about the inappropriate response of the Peace Corps to volunteers who become victims of crime. Current PCVs and RPCVs should absolutely participate in the First Response Action survey regarding our sexual assault training here.

 I've felt extremely compelled the entire time of my service by Kate Puzey's story and the response of PC/Benin and Washington. PCVs in Benin are intimately aware of inefficiencies in this area and it is a source of constant frustration. I find it hard to believe that ALL Peace Corps countries have this much malcontent on administrative issues. I know it's tough everywhere, but I honestly think the ET rate would be higher worldwide if it was like Benin everywhere (approaching 25% here). That gives me hope that we just happen to be in a more "malignant" program that is doing its best to change and become better equipped to handle itself. The idea that other countries might be better is encouraging. But as far as crime responses go, it seems like it's a worldwide Peace Corps fault. Especially as far as sexual assault and rape reporting goes.

I won't repeat statistics and stories you can read elsewhere, but it's a problem in reality and not just the attitude of the training video screened. Reporters are not valued, treated like they were the cause of their own effect, and discouraged from pursuing justice. This is often done in the name of cultural sensitivity and understanding but really it's just bullshit. No culture condones rape even if the details are varied across the spectrum. But the important thing is that American norms on the subject are very serious and frankly, the Peace Corps should treat these incidents exactly the same as if they happened in America. The fact that host country nationals are in administrative positions shouldn't matter. Train them to respond as an American to these issues. There's no excuse.

A few solutions were presented in the NYT article that I agree with wholeheartedly and think are feasible and legitimate. One, hiring someone trained in sexual assault survivor empowerment to specifically overhaul the Peace Corps's approach to these incidents and their appropriate response through trainings and policy revamping. Two, get rid of that fucking video and replace it with something created by a knowledgeable and credible crisis center or organization. Three,  the development of "sexual assault response teams" to collect forensic evidence and provide advocacy to survivors. I also think there needs to be an advocacy group established in each country of volunteers and trained professionals who can counsel on that specific country's procedures for filing a report and pressing charges. Another suggestion would be to follow the First Response  Action group's 7 point plan to specifically address issues of sexual violence against Peace Corps Volunteers including the "Survivor Bill of Rights" with standardized protocols of response. These things should be legislated in the states and enforced abroad immediately.

Politics should not enter into the equation at any point. This is not a Democrat/Republican issue at all, but an American one. We are serving our country and the world and should be protected appropriately under law. These arguments do not devalue the promise of the organization promised by JFK or hurt the Democrats and should not lead to funding cuts or compromised legitimacy of the Peace Corps. Director Williams needs to commit to supporting future legislation protecting the volunteers because it's the only responsible course of action he can follow as the head of an organization with increasing numbers of female volunteers in the world.

These criticisms are not aimed at breaking down the Peace Corps or discouraging future, interested volunteers, especially women. I think this has been and will continue to be one the most life changing and powerful experiences of my life. I love Benin and I love the people. I feel at home here and am more proud than I've ever been to be an American citizen and a representative of my country abroad. I think joining the Peace Corps is one of the best decisions I ever made and would encourage people to follow me. But I also know that the organization can be improved, the experience of women in the world can be made safer and healthier and more in tune with truer American values. The Peace Corps has a responsibility to act as a role model in how it responds to sexual violence; it is a visible organization and a powerful force in a world that generally mistreats and devalues women. It's about damn time it started acting like it.

Puzey trial on hold

I just received information that the Government of Benin has decided that there is not enough information and evidence to bring the Kate Puzey murder case to trial. The American ambassador and Director Williams are both "highly disappointed and concerned" and will continue to urge the government to reconsider. Apparently they are requesting the FBI and the government of Benin to work together to re-open the investigation. The Peace Corps told the Puzeys that they will continue to press for justice and that the suspects will remain incarcerated until the government of Benin decides what to do next.

I am extremely disappointed and frustrated by this determination. This is just another example of the cultural differences between the two justice systems in our countries. I am however, pleased at the relative transparency of this recent development on the part of the Benin administration , as this was shared with us via text message this afternoon.

I have no idea what the next steps are going to be and I am just constantly disappointed in the Peace Corps and Benin in the handling of this situation. I wish all the best to the Puzey family in coping with these issues as well. I know my family would never stop fighting either.

Ok, maybe some more editorializing

So I have some more thoughts that I need to get out about this. And, remember, I do not speak for the Peace Corps or the US or Beninese governments...I'm just one volunteer, a cog in the machine, a brick in the wall. So, okay.

I've been reading a few of the volunteers' blogs on peacecorpsjournals.com about the special; I was just curious about what some of them thought about the whole thing. I was really surprised to see the level of ABC bashing and the huge amount of support for the Peace Corps as an organization. I mean, I understand that Applicants need to not say anything worthwhile on their blog. But, other volunteers? I refuse to believe that all these other volunteers can so easily write off the news story as "bad journalism," purely sensationalistic crap, and then in the same sentence give support to the both Kate's family AND the Peace Corps administration. I mean, maybe next time, 20/20 could try to do something good and not "attack a national organization"? Really? Have you ever read the Constitution of the United States of America? I just can't accept that these PCVs and applicants are all just blindly throwing support to the Peace Corps as this great and wonderful organization saving the world. I mean, come on. Yeah, the 20/20 special was muckraking, sensational, incendiary and tear-jerking and it damn well needed to be. It's been almost two years since her murder and the Peace Corps certainly isn't getting the American public invested or the Beninese government for that matter. I can completely understand turning toward the media. At least people are talking about it now. Ongoing investigation my ass. There are 4 lawyers in this country.

Look, guys. It's not like a random volunteer was murdered and people are upset that the Peace Corps is mishandling the case and not giving us details. That's not what's frustrating to me and to other PC/Benin volunteers here. Peace Corps Benin specifically caused her murder. She brought attention to the behavior of one of her fellow teachers and Peace Corps language facilitator by a private email that was inappropriately forwarded to the coworker's brother, one of the higher ups in the PC/Benin and she was brutally murdered as retaliation for the loss of his job. Peace Corps Benin killed Kate. The story damn well better be sensationalistic.

It's nice to think that the Peace Corps administration in your country has your back. And I'm pretty sure that most of the time, in most countries, they absolutely do. I really do feel safe in Djougou. I love my community and I honestly believe in the work that I am doing here for the Peace Corps and as a representative for America. I genuinely like the good folks who work at the bureau in Cotonou, both the Americans and the host country nationals...but, it doesn't serve anyone's interests for PCVs to just close our eyes and give blanketed support to the organization. I know that the Peace Corps is great, but I also know it can be better. I feel like I have a responsibility as a PCV in Benin and as an American to criticize the Peace Corps and I'm not planning on stopping until I see this organization reach its potential. And the fact that I'm able to do it at all is what makes both the Peace Corps and America so fucking amazing.

Elaina

20/20 about Kate

Hi everyone, I just wanted to let everyone know about the ABC special that aired yesterday about Kate's murder. As I type this I am attempting to load it, but the internet...(surprise surprise) is pretty spotty right now. Go ahead and try it! I hear it was pretty intense/sensationalistic and the first 30 seconds that I've managed to see definitely confirms that.

So, the Peace Corps in Washington doesn't seem to be too pleased. We all received a text today alerting us that an official response was up on the website. I got myself to the cyber cafe and found this:

ABC's program is deeply troubling and does not accurately reflect Peace Corps' unwavering commitment to our volunteers. The health and safety of our volunteers is the single most important priority for our agency. We are consistently reviewing and improving our global operations to ensure that we are doing our best to keep our volunteers healthy, safe and productive.

"We cannot comment on the ongoing investigation into the 2009 murder of volunteer Kate Puzey in Benin or do anything else that could risk compromising that investigation or the possibility of a successful prosecution. Peace Corps does not have a role in the ongoing investigation, but we have been assured that the Benin government is supporting the legal process necessary to conclude the investigation and begin a trial. The Department of State and the FBI have been working with the Benin authorities.

"Kate represented the best America has to offer the world with her dedication to her community and commitment to public service. Kate's death was a tragic loss for the Peace Corps. We continue to grieve with the Puzey family and Kate's friends. It is my sincere hope that justice is served both for Kate and her family. I would like to offer my apologies to the Puzey family if either the former leadership or the agency under my direction could have been more compassionate. Personally, it is heartbreaking to learn that they ever felt abandoned by the Peace Corps. This has never been our intent.

"Under my leadership, the Peace Corps has been implementing reforms to enhance the quality of Peace Corps service. These reforms include strengthening all health and safety measures. We do everything we can to keep our volunteers safe, and for those who sadly fall victim to crime, we do everything we can to support them in their recovery. The women interviewed by 20/20 are courageous and strong. Their stories are heartbreaking. Since their service, Peace Corps has improved sexual assault prevention procedures and practices, and we will continue to be responsive to the victims of assault and provide comprehensive care.

"We will never be able to eliminate volunteers' exposure to crimes overseas, but we will work continuously to maximize the safety and health systems supporting our volunteers. This is my pledge to Americans serving today and to the volunteers of tomorrow."

The Peace Corps released their initial statement to ABC 20/20 as well as a response and you can find it here:

"January 11, 2011

During the production of your story and the interview with Deputy Director Carrie Hessler-Radelet, thePeace Corps has made it clear that, in the interest of justice for Kate Puzey and her family, we will not comment on the ongoing investigation into the murder of Kate Puzey or do anything else that could risk compromising that investigation or any prosecution of the case.

It is understandable that the Puzey family wants more information about what happened to their daughter.

Kate’s family has our deepest sympathies for their tragic loss, and the Peace Corps is united with the Puzey family in the pursuit of justice for Kate. We have also put into place new protocols that respond to the concerns expressed by the Puzeys on how the agency supports the families of fallen volunteers. Peace Corps does not have a role in the ongoing investigation, but we have been assured that the Benin government is supporting the legal process necessary to conclude the investigation and begin a trial. The Department of State and the FBI have been working with the Benin authorities.

Peace Corps manages a comprehensive approach to volunteer safety and security. We always are working to improve and strengthen our training and operations for our staff and volunteers abroad. We will never be able to entirely eliminate volunteers’ exposure to crimes overseas, but we will continue to do our best to make Peace Corps a safe and productive experience for the Americans serving as volunteers today and in the future.

A second component to your story covers the concerns of Peace Corps volunteers who have been raped or sexually assaulted while serving abroad. When anything happens to one of our volunteers, we do our best to offer comprehensive support through medical, counseling, and legal services. We are unwavering in our efforts to strengthen our approach to volunteer safety and security.

Since August 2009, when Aaron Williams became Director of the Peace Corps, the agency has put into place measures to improve our security and support operations. The Peace Corps has developed an enhanced agency wide sexual assault prevention and response strategy. This plan is designed to expand the depth and breadth of the agency’s ability and commitment to prevent and respond to sexual assaults. Accordingly, we have undertaken a comprehensive study of best practices in the field of sexual assault prevention, met with leaders in the field of

rape prevention and response, written new guidelines for responding to rapes and major sexual assaults for use by overseas staff, developed a statement of Peace Corps’ commitment to victims of sexual assault, and updated the agency’s incident reporting system.

Although we have made significant progress in strengthening our security and support operations, we know that more needs to be done. We are committed to implementing additional reforms this year and in the future to improve all aspects of volunteer service. As we proceed, we will keep listening to our volunteers and returned volunteers. In addition, we will continue to seek advice and counsel from outside experts and other government agencies on how to improve our security and support systems.

Peace Corps is proud that the vast majority of volunteers feel safe in the areas where they live and work. According to the 2010 Annual Volunteer Survey, 87 percent of our volunteers reported that they were usually safe or very safe where they live and 91 percent reported the same where they work. Peace Corps remains firmly committed to the safety and security of our volunteers. It is our top priority. If ABC News’ 20/20 needs more information on our global operations as you edit your piece, we are available to provide additional data and information to ensure that your program is fair and accurate."

So I don't really want to editorialize too much, but damn, man. I think the Peace Corps fucked up with both the initial situation and the handling of her death. I continue to be surprised that this program stayed open at all. When a trial didn't happen in November, we should have left then. We should have said "Benin, take care of this and if you don't, we're gone."

There is a fundamental difference between Beninese law and the American concept of justice. We believe we should have a fair trial and the guilty should be made to reap what they have sewn. Innocent until proven guilty. Here you're guilty unless proven innocent and since there is little doubt of the killers' participation in the crime, the Benin government feels that justice is being served by having them just rot away in jail without seeing trial. But that's not very American, and shouldn't the murder of an American volunteer have some sort of American concept of justice as closure for her family and a nation? We want a trial, it would be easy as pie for a trial to happen. I'm at the point where I am going to write a fucking letter to Hillary Clinton with 100 signatures of current Peace Corps Benin volunteers urging her to make a call that could completely get things going here. It's about damn time...and now I'm done with my comments haha.

Thoughts? Concerns?

Happy New Year!

January 09, 2011
8:42pm

I have finally gotten back to my place after what has been a month of travels and holidays. Colt has been and gone, we’ve rung in the new year, my three month integration period is officially over, and in less than a week, my stage will have been in country for half a year. Before I delve too much into that whole passage of time thing, I thought I’d let everyone know that this Friday, the 14th, 20/20 is supposed to be airing the special on Kate Puzey’s death. Please tune in and someone send me a copy!

Colt was here for almost 15 days and it feels like we built a little life for us here during his time. Christmas morning was a blur of travel to Djougou and we basically showered and crashed into bed for several hours. I think he had been traveling for like 40 hours or something by that point. We woke up on the 26th and did our Christmas morning then. We took lots of ridiculously adorable photos and made dinner…tacos! Then we basically spent the rest of the week eating local food and watching an insane amount of 30 Rock and Inception (I almost convinced him to let me watch it a third time, but he convinced me to watch some Californication instead). We enjoyed each other’s company and fell into a lovely sort of routine that involved meeting up with some of my friends here, eating too much, and seeing my village. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. New Years’ was rung in with card games, cake, and champagne. Colt read Ender’s Game while I continued to gavage myself with 30 Rock and we started to get a little sick of each other. I think the constant cold showers started to get to him…no hot water and it is damn cold in the mornings here during Harmattan. We smoked some hookah on my roof the last day we were in Djougou and got yam pilee once more with cold cokes and then watched Pineapple Express and giggled like dorks while we cuddled. Ahhh. Then we stayed two nights in Cotonou where we just ate out at all the nice places I can never afford (Chinese, Thai, Lebanese, etc) and his last day we spent at the workstation while I was sick and throwing up for several hours (good timing!). He held me, though, and although we ended up not getting to go out to Indian food that night like we’d planned, it was nice to just spend those last hours alone and close. I did feel sort of guilty though…but I guess I shouldn’t have tried to be so macho and drink the shower water. That’s what I get haha. His flight left on the 7th late at night and he has safely arrived back home and had Christmas with his family. I sent a bunch of random African gifts for him to disperse to various people, just little trinkets and stuff, nothing fancy (I am so broke right now!). It was a wonderful visit, we took lots of pictures and videos, and hopefully the next 8 months and 3 weeks will pass by without hardly any notice at all! Yeah, we’ll see about that. =(

Hmm, let’s see…what else? Big projects are starting to get going now that I’m allowed to really jump into work…several girls and boys camp meetings are going on this month and I am going to get back into going to the health center regularly in addition to my time at the office. I need to get some scrubs made for the maternity so I can help with births, but until then I am going to help out a midwife nurse when she inserts IUDs and Norplant birth control. The Peace Corps has restructured some of its goals so that now what was my primary project (sexual health and family planning) is now technically a secondary project…so I also need to try to get more involved with the maternal health side and do more prenatal consultations and stuff with the midwives. In a really bullshit red tape move, the Peace Corps noticed that volunteers weren’t meeting family planning goals, so instead of giving us more training or directive, they just decided to abolish that program as a major source of focus, thereby making the stats look better, but not fixing the underlying issue. That’s just one example in a growing list of examples about Peace Corps administrative bureaucracy that seriously hinders volunteers’ ability to effectively work abroad. Sigh. Onto more pleasant things…

Er…yeah, I got nothing. Oh! Next month I’m going to Pendjari, the national park, with Andrew and Krista, Eric, and a couple other people. I had originally planned on going with Colt when he was here…but well, that didn’t work out. So too bad for him, I guess I’ll just send him a picture of the awesome lions I’ll see!

It’s hard to believe I’ve been here for 6 months already. Time has really flown by it seems and yet it feels like I’ve been here for soooo long. For some reason I can feel like I just boarded the plane from Kansas City a couple weeks ago and also feel like I’ve been here for years simultaneously. I guess it was the same thing in college; day to day felt insanely drawn out, but by the time I graduated, I felt like I’d just blinked and it was over. I do wish I would have savored my time at Wellesley a little more, but I think I did okay. Similarly, I think I’ll do fine here in my looking toward the future and yet relishing my moments in the present. I suppose there will a time when I look back on my service and wish that I would have just been more involved in the day to day small things and knowing that keeps me a little more grounded even though I just want it to be a year from now so badly. The time will come, though, and probably sooner than I think I’ll be saying goodbye.

And when I do…I’ll be a vegetarian again. Because right now…well, I’m not. Not exactly. I’ve decided to be an Afri-tarian. I only eat meat while I’m here in Africa. I’m just so protein deficient especially if I want to avoid palm oil fried wagasi. I’m also basically a vegetarian for economic reasons stemming from the commercial meat industry in the United States, which clearly does not exist here. So I’m eating fish and poultry which I haven’t eaten since 2004. The chickens here are all free range and crustaceans are basically just big bugs anyway. I’m actually sort of grabbing onto meat eating with gusto. I was calling myself a ‘meatatarian’ for a while, especially while gnawing the bones of a particularly tasty guinea fowl when colt was here. I’m planning on enjoying it while I can and reverting back when I finish up here, although there is something to be said about spending my money on free range meat in the United States as it adds an even more forceful economic incentive for companies to use humane treatment of their livestock. I’m not sure, we’ll see.

Moving on…Medical school packets for the advisory committee are due in a couple weeks so I need to really get cracking on that. Hopefully that will keep me busy enough to not count down the days until I see Colt again. I need to have an awesome application so I can go home to interview!

And speaking of that, I wanted to publicly declare that Colt and I are clenched into a competitive battle to lose weight. Whoever reaches their goal weight first gets to decide the number of children we’ll have in the future. This is not a decision he will get to make. Thus I must win. So please, no one send me pasta or sugar. If it’s in my house I’ll eat it, but if it’s not, then I will be the champion. Send Colt, however, lots and lots of goodies. I’ll update my wish list to include canned or packaged tuna and mints instead of chocolate and velveeta cheese…as much as that pains me.

I guess that’s it for now…things should start to get back to a semblance of routine, or at least as routine as is possible in Benin. For example, tomorrow is a voodoo national holiday and I don’t have to go in to work. Hello, Lord of the Rings marathon! My life is sort of awesome, yeah?

See ya when I see ya,

Elaina

Kate update

So all of us received an email from our country director and he informed us of his sadness about ''all the rumors'' going around about Kate's death and the Peace Corps. From what I've gathered, the email from the RPCVs do not encourage rumors at all, but gave us information for the first time since arriving here. But, I know the administration is hindered in what they can actually tell us and I'm sure they're frustrated by that as well. See how understanding I can be?

Basically, there will not be a 20/20 special in December and according to our CD, it probably won't air until January. But the ABC TV crews were here in Benin for interviews and to get footage of her village in Badjoudé, about 20 kilometers from me to the west and right on the Togo border.

From his email:

''Crimes committed against Peace Corps Volunteers overseas generally fall under the legal jurisdiction of the government of the country in whichthe crime was committed. In this case, the government of Benin is conducting the investigation into this matter. The Peace Corps has no direct role in the criminal investigation into Kate's death, and we have only limited information about the status of that investigation. The investigation is ongoing, and this phase, which is conducted by a judge,will be the foundation for an eventual trial. A trial date cannot be scheduled until the investigation is completed. We have been assured by senior officials in the Government that they are committed to doing everything possible to find out what happened and to bring justice.''

I am trying very hard not to fault the PC/Benin administration with their handling of the entire situation and to a certain extent it really does seem like their hands are tied. Why doesn't the murder of an American citizen concern the legal processes in America? It sort of seems like it should, right? I know that I would like to think that justice will be served America style if something were to happen to me overseas. Does it really not work that way? Is justice completely at the hands of the host country, no matter how sophisticated or inept? Because that is a little bit scary.

Anyway, that is all the news I have for now for the public. I have to be careful not to, ''even inadvertantly'' compromise the investigation.

Watch 20/20 on December 3rd

As many of you know or have heard, Catherine (Kate) Puzey was a volunteer here in Benin who was killed last year in March. The details surrounding her murder have been frustratingly concealed from us as current volunteers and her family as sections from the following letter will show. Kate served as an English teacher in Badjoudé, a town close to Djougou, where I live. In fact, my post is the closest Peace Corps post to her town. When we arrived in Benin this summer we were informed of the event and there was an informal discussion about the events surrounding her death. I was surprised to find out the depth of involvement from higher ups in the Peace Corps Benin and I am actually continuously surprised at the fact that Peace Corps/Benin did not get completely discontinued. I am glad it hasn't, though. At least not yet. The trial is supposed to start this month, but has been delayed for various reasons. On December 3rd there will be a feature about Kate's death on 20/20 that I hope you all tune in for. While this was a very specific, isolated incident that in no way jeapardizes the safety of current volunteers, it is incredibly important for all Peace Corps administration and volunteers and thus all Americans to pay attention and prevent it from happening again.

Many names have been left out to protect privacy and I am including the letter here solely in order to provide information to the public and those concerned about Benin in particular. This email was forwarded to all currently serving Peace Corps Volunteers (PCVs) in Benin as well as many recently Returned Peace Corps Volunteers (RPCVs) from two RPCVs who knew Kate well and is in no way an official document related to the current investigation:

Dear All,
Hello!! How are all of you?? ...A lot, a lot has gone down since we all left Benin, in terms of Kate and the impending trial. Not to make excuses, but it's been really difficult forus to sit with all of the information we're going to share, and not know when the appropriatetime to disperse it is. We'll get to it a little later,but there will be some publicity regarding Kate and the PeaceCorps soon, so we knew it was time to write this email. Since coming back to the States,we've been in consistent, close contact with the Puzey's. Through this,we've been privilege to a lot of knowledge that we otherwise wouldn't have been, as the Peace Corps has done a mighty fine job of keeping information out of our(all of our) hands, both as former/present volunteers and friends of Kate. We're not sure who knows what at this point, so we're just going to start at the beginning.

Towards the start of our 2009 February break from school, -- went to Badjoude. While there, Kate expressed concern about C-- (J--'s brother, thelanguage facilitator for Health) and stories she'd been told of his raping and humiliating two of his young students. She also was led to believe that he breached his contract by having a relationship with at least one stagiaire. Because of this information, as well as her own knowledge of C--'s general sliminess/coming to classes drunk/etc., Kate knew she neededto bringthis toAdmin's attention. She spent a lot of time trying todecidethe best way tocontact S--. She eventually chose email, and sent theattached note to S--, CCing F--, on February 27, 2009. We've also attached the responses Kate received. As you can see from the chain, S--and F--quickly took to heart what Kate told them. However, Kate never knew this. She sent the email on Friday from Natitingou. She left for Badjoude (no internet) on March 1, 2009. To be fair, at somepoint during the two weeks Kate was in Badjoude she received a callfrom M--. I remember getting a fewtexts from Kate about this, but I can't remember specifically what she wastold. I do know that she was made aware that PeaceCorps was "handling" the situation, and M-- asked if Kate would be interested in legal action beingtaken against C--for the raping of students. Because that knowledge washearsay, Kate said she didn't think that was yet appropriate. Thisis the only indication we have that Kate would have any idea that Admin was taking her email seriously.We want to interject here. We assume you all remember All Vol at DuLac in March 2008. One of the biggest issues tirelessly discussed was the refusal by Admin to not use email as a valid method of quick communication. Case in point. Kate never received the emails that youseeattached. She also never knew that on March 10, C-- received a letter letting him know that he would no longer be contractually employed by the PeaceCorps. (For the record, we're unsure if any disciplinary action was taken by the school.) Kate was killed either the night of March 11 or the morning of March12. In this email, we're tryingvery hard to be as diplomatic as possible, but there are times, like this one, when that just seems insane. By emailing Kateinstead of calling, Peace Corps actively took her right away to make decisionsabout what would be best for her and her safety. ...

About a week after Kate's death, J--loses his security clearance. Beforethe Easter break in April 2009, several of us were interviewed when the Peace Corps Inspector General's Office sent two investigators to Benin. We were told by the investigators that their purpose was to determine what, if anything, happened in the Peace Corps office that would have directly been tied to Kate's death. On May 28, 2009 F-- resigns. In mid-June 2009,S-- announces herintent to resign by the end of the month. Another pointtirelessly discussed atAll-Vol was Admin's constant breaching ofc onfidentiality. While in Benin wespeculated this had a major role in Kate's death since ONLY S--and F--were emailed about C--. ...Now we're home. We'reapproached by Lois (Kate's mom) to be part of a task forceto seek justicefor Kate, both in terms of a trial as well as Peace Corpsreform. Lois expressed to us how initially the Peace Corps was sympathetic totheir loss,but that soon turned to complete stonewalling when they startedaskingquestions. Not to mention how they were notified. ... Her effects were simply dropped off some time later with no note or representative. For several months, we compiled information and brainstormed various ways to affect chance.This all came to a head in February 2010 when we, along with Kate's parents and her cousin, went to Washington to meet with Director (of the Peace Corps)Williams, Senator Isakson, andseveral other staff members for various other Senators and Representatives.Our goal was to present the reform we seenecessaryto ensure that nothinglike this happens again to a volunteer. This included:
A. Better notification practices of next of kin
B. Standard procedure for keeping confidentiality
C. Standard procedure for ways that volunteers can notify PC Admin of sensitive information
D. Standard procedure for communication(particularly ofsensitiveinformation) between Admin and volunteers
E.The possibility of volunteers being covered under the Whistle Blower Protection Act

...

One more thing. So throughout this whole process the lackof media attention for Kate's murder has been kind of astounding. The Puzey's arevery much interested in Kate's story being told on a national/international platform...ThePuzey's were approached by 20/20,and jumped at the opportunity. As part ofthisprocess, we were interviewed. The experience seems to have been quitepositiveand therapeutic for Kate's family. However, for us, it was really pretty terrible. We realize our position as former volunteers creates adifferentdynamic than that of family. Although we feel strongly that Kate'sstory be toldand that Peace Corps reforms are put in place, wedidn't feellike we were in theposition to do any speculating or name names on national television, much less on a sensationalistic program. 20/20 wasn'tso happy with our position. We still agreed to be interviewed, discussingonly first-hand knowledge, as the Puzey'sreally wanted that. All of this tosay, the first segment of the program will beairing in December 3, 2010 at10pm (EST). We have no idea what to expect...

The trial, although slated to happen this November, will not happen until who knowswhen...We know that a lot of information to take in. And we also know that we might nothave presentedit in entirely the clearest way possible. So please let usknow if you have anyquestions. We're sending this email to all TEFL butplease pass this along toanyone else you think should know.
Love to all,
--

So that's that. I have a little bit more information for anyone who emails me or facebook messages me directly, but I do want to keep things respectful of the privacy of those more involved than me. I want to reiterate as well that this email is in no way official and is also not completely represented here, so there's no way to take it as anything more than just hearsay, right? I have no authority here and my opinion does not reflect that of the Peace Corps/Benin or Peace Corps/Washington or the Peace Corps Inspector General's Office. So please just watch the show in a couple weeks and someone please tell me how it goes!

Elaina