Peace Corps Reform

There is little doubt that the Peace Corps is a valued and respected organization. For fifty years, volunteers have impacted the world and served as beacons of American altruism. The organization as a whole has often been above reproach, a legacy of the Kennedy administration, and returned volunteers and currently serving volunteers alike shy away from criticizing the agency that has been such a huge part of their lives. This is starting to change, and rightly so. If the Peace Corps wants to stay relevant for another 50 years, it has a long way to go.

A recent article describes many of the challenges facing the agency and many of the questions that must be answered. In the article, there is reference to Chuck Ludlam and his wife, Paula Hirschoff, two RPCVs who have taken the lead in the Peace Corps reform action. Their 20 point reform plan calls for budgetary reforms and ways to strengthen the organization (including decreasing the alarming 35% ET rate and plans to achieve sustainable first goal results). They and others are also pushing strongly to get PCVs “whistleblower rights” protecting volunteers when they do speak out. This is, of course, an issue very close to home (literally; Kate’s village, Badjoude, is 30 kilometers away from me). Kate’s death was a direct result of Peace Corps administration not respecting her confidentiality and it never should have happened.

Luckily, many of these reform movements are seeing press. The ABC 20/20 episode about Peace Corps scandals has gotten people talking. Ludlam and Hirschoff have continued speaking out, even if controversial, and I know they are working hard, contacting current volunteers and RPCVs to lend support to reform. The Congressional hearings last month about sexual assault changes in the agency are a step in the right direction, but we need more. I happen to have a few ideas on the subject…

What we don’t need is simply more volunteers. Before we worry about expansion, we need to strengthen. We need better development priorities, sustainable project training. We need better qualified volunteers with more experience. We need to make sure that volunteers are safe and protected, even from the Peace Corps itself. We need better systems for volunteers reporting crimes like sexual assault and rape. We need better training and more resources. Absolutely we need better transparency from the agency and hard-hitting evaluations and feedback. The ET rate is too high, red-tape and country specific bureaucracy lead to tension and frustration for volunteers, our role as a development organization has never been really established, and projects are often unsustainable. We need significant reforms on all levels.

One thing specifically would be more financial support for projects. We as volunteers have to raise money for most of our projects. It would be nice if the Peace Corps as an organization could provide funds for specific ideas. For example, our girls’ camp this month was funded entirely by friends and family in the states. This is a major undertaking that has been successful in this area of Benin for five years and makes a clear and distinctive impact on the community. It is a major project for many of us and yet all the financing is external to the Peace Corps. Another idea, one that Ludlam and Hirschoff agree with, is increased collaboration with larger aid organizations. The Peace Corps is not an aid organization, per se. It’s sort of a mini-aid organization with large cultural and community based exchange aspects. If we were partnered up more frequently with bigger organizations, we could be valuable volunteer workers for developmental aid in a more roundabout way. This is basically what I am doing working with PSI, a large American based international NGO. I am, however, one of only two of us in our 60 member training group who actually works with an organization of this magnitude. And I’m still frustrated with my work a lot of the time.

I initially thought my frustration was only due to the general difficulty of working in development aid in Africa, but that’s just not true. I’m frustrated not only because development work is hard, but because the Peace Corps isn’t really a development organization at all! We don’t have the training or resources to really be effective with international development work. We aren’t really even expected to be. Maybe this realization will help me stop beating myself up about not saving the world. I’m just supposed to experience the world. I’m not sure I accept that, though.

I know that a lot of people value the ambiguous nature of the Peace Corps as more of a cultural exchange program than a development program, but personally, I resent it. I wish the Peace Corps would figure out what we’re really supposed to be doing. If we want to shift work more toward a legitimate development program, we would have a lot of changes to make. Things like data collection, selecting more experienced volunteers, and allowing administrators and managers to work for more than five years would help us look more legit. Of course, not everyone wants this. A lot of people still see the Peace Corps as a time for personal growth, learning a new language, becoming a better citizen of the world, and to a certain degree I totally agree with this. I have already been immensely impacted in how I will approach the world and I know I’ve gotten to know my community much better than the workers in more traditional aid agencies do. I have friends here and am really a part of this place. I’m not sure that would be possible if the Peace Corps was more centralized and focused on development. The fact that Volunteers make the agency what they will is a powerful and romantic idea. We do what we need to do without a set-in-stone mission and there’s something wonderful about that, I agree. But what is it that we really need to do in the world? What is our real goal as an organization? Do we want our tax dollars to go to recent college grads on a two year cultural vacation? We need to figure these things out before we can move forward. And it’s not just me that needs to get thinking; this is something Peace Corps Washington needs to decide.

It has been 50 years. It is time to start asking those penetrating questions. We, as volunteers, as returned volunteers and managers inside the administration, have a unique responsibility to speak up. As Hirschoff and Ludlam say:

“Those of us who revere the Peace Corps should take the lead in asking these questions. Those who care the most…should ask the hardest questions. The Peace Corps is an historic and romantic vestige of the values of the 60s and the New Frontier, but that role is not sufficient to explain and justify its role in the 21st Century. The ultimate act of loyalty to the Peace Corps is to ask the tough questions before outsiders do.” 

So let’s get crackin’. Once again, I really hope I’m not coming across as an anti-Peace Corps volunteer. I know the administration here has my blog address, but I’m not sure how frequently they stop by. Probably not at all (but just in case…hi, guys!). I don’t think my criticisms can be considered inappropriate content and I’ve never had my blog be mentioned to me by anyone in the administration…yet. But I worry about it sometimes. The fact is, we’re not really protected over here and I’ve heard stories of administrative separations (ad-seps) for online content. Granted, those were usually due to country specific political posts, or wildly disrespectful information about the country or the country’s people, but…the fear is there. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter. I won’t be silenced just because I worry about who is listening. I believe I have a right and a responsibility to talk about this stuff, to challenge the organization that I believe in so strongly to become better.

I hope in fifty years there will be someone like me riding around on her hover board (you know, ‘cause it’s the future), making the choice to join a still relevant, still powerful, still life-altering and idealistic Peace Corps. But we have to start now to make that happen.

IST

Interservice Training has been super boring and also awesome. We've been able to all see each other and hang out with dance parties on the roof of Songhai and Israelis, moto crashes, project designing tools, local language practice, practice sensibilizations, and very couth evenings of johnny walker red and coke. I must say it's been practical and interesting and amusing. Imorou is definitely the homologue who walks the walk and talks the talk which is not always as awesome as it sounds.

I had forgotten how muggy and humid it is in the south. it sucks. i had also forgotten how to discuter zem prices and deal with the super aggressiveness of the fon people. i miss djougou and my bed and shower although we are sleeping in air conditioning now.

i saw the host family and had more conversation with them than i did in like the 9 weeks i actually lived with them. i think my french has definitely improved ou bien i am just less terrified of speaking now and making crazy mistakes.

So I'd like to type more about this bountiful week but all i can think about is the fact that colt is on a plane right now getting ready to land in new york...and then he'll be IN BENIN with MEEEEE in like a day and a half (ok, it's precisely 31 and a half hours not like I'm counting down or anything).

We are going on safari, and rocking it in djougou and having soooo much...FUN!

So, yeah, I probably won't update or be on facebook or talk to another human being until 2011. So, sorry in advance and HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

love and miss you all, please send letters and chocolate,
xoxo
e

Porto Novo

July 20th, 10:25pm Beninese time/4:25pm CST, Contonou

So first thing's first: I bought a phone! And 3000cfa worth of minutes! And then used up 2000cfa talking to mom less than an hour ago! I also called Colt's fam, looking for a number to get in touch with him...but, rather unsurprisingly, they didn't know either. Bad puppy! Dad was also unavailable. Geez, people.

I'm sitting here now in the hotel room in Cotonou, listening to many of the other stagaiers (pronounced in a french-y sort of way like "staahh-gee-airs" meaning "trainees") outside on the patio drinking and enjoying our last night all together. Tomorrow we're off to meet our new host families in Porto Novo where we'll be until September 17th. They are supposed to provide us food and shelter and help us figure out how to do laundry and get to our classes as well as communicate with us in french and help us learn about Beninois culture. The kids of the family are supposed to actually walk us to school on the first day! We got photos of our families and there are 11 people in mine and it looks like 5 of them are teenage girls! Maybe they like Twilight lol. There is a papa with two wives and two smaller kids like age 10 or 11 with another older woman who might be a grandma or aunt. I seriously can't wait to meet them and get to work remembering their names.

Training will be at a primary school in Porto Novo, walking or biking distance from our family's house. The Rural Communicty Health (RCH) and the Teaching English as a Foreign Language (TEFL) people are all together on one side of the city at one school and the Environmental Action (EA) and the Small Business Development (SED) people are on the other. My married couple friends, Krista and Andrew, are in different schools (Krista is RCH and Andrew is EA), but will live somewhere in the middle of Porto Novo with their host family and will spend most of the day apart. I like them because they are both awesome. Today, the guard of the hotel (who is hilarious, btw and speaks about as much English as I do French) confused me with Krista and asked me if Andrew was sleeping in our room. After a couple really confused moments I just burst into laugher and re-introduced myself. He thought that was pretty funny when I explained and later when Andrew came down, we all joked that he had two blonde wives. Ah, good stuff.

I am really excited to meet my family and nervous about my ability to communicate effectively en francais with them. There are a lot of simple things I really just don't remember how to say and my vocabulary is ridiculously bad. For the most part I remember a lot of verbs and basic conjugation, but that was always my strong suit. Ask me how to say "window" or "monkey" in french and I will be lost.

During my long and very expensive (haha, mom, I love you) conversation with my mom, I mentioned that I had like a million mosquito bites and she expressed surprise since I had written earlier here that I had yet to see a mosquito. Well, just to clarify, I still haven't SEEN one, but I have seriously 23 bites on my lower limbs (none above the ankle yet though...). The little suckers are tiny and for some weird reason I really haven't actually caught one in the act yet, even though it feels like I am getting attacked pretty hardcore right now. I don't know how they get under the mosquito net at night! Ah!

I started my mefloquine today (that's the one that is supposed to give us crazy dreams) to prevent malaria. Not to alarm anyone, but apparently I missed one of my doxycycline doses this week. I have one extra pill in my case that I shouldn't. Oh well. I told the doctor during my medical interview this morning and she said that since I am doubling up today with the doxy and the mefloquine that I should be protected. Malaria is a truly interesting disease. One that I do not want, but sort of do in a strange masochistic way. But don't worry, that one doxy miss was a one time deal; I'll be taking the mef once a week on schedule like a good girl. The most common malaria strain here also happens to be the most deadly and I'd rather not risk it, call me crazy.

Things I want to buy in Porto Novo: multiple traditional skirts and full African outfits, a big purse/bag for all my shit bc I don't like carrying around my backpack all the time, a wallet/change purse for my money and la petite monaie (coin change...basically anything less than 1000 francs is a coin), and my kickass, awesome, will-be-planning-it-every-time-I-see-a-place-to-buy-tissue wedding dress. I'm SURE I will think of other things to purchase with my HUGE Peace Corps salary*. I love SHOPPING!

I shorted out my surge protector by trying to plug it into the universal adaptor I brought that I had plugged into the wall here. There was a big spark and then smoke started coming out of it. I'm sort of confused because it says that it works for up to 330 V and the voltage here is 220 V...compared to the United States of 120V....so whatever. I can just buy a universal power strip for like 300 francs. I don't understand this technology stuff. But fuck, I love my netbook. It is really portable and light, small and convenient. Almost as cool as me.

I am going for another run tomorrow morning with K and A and a couple other people. It is really funny to see the look of surprise on people's faces when they see all the yovos running in unison down the street at 6:30 in the morning. I'm sure running in PN or village will be much more fun because it's even more unusual there. Score!

AH. Traditional Beninese food was today. The food we've been having is a sort of Americanized toned down version with couscous or rice or pasta with some sort of tomato and onion based sauce with a meat or cheese side and white, french baguette bread. That is not necessarily the stuff that the Beninois eat. What they have is pate with sauce. It's pronounced "pot" and it is made from some grain that I can't remember that they boil until it's sticky and solid. They use that to pick up the sauce with the right hand (the left hand is taboo in Beninois society). The sauces I've had are the tomato which I like, the vegetable legume one which is delicious, and the okra one...which is like snot in color and consistancy and disgusting. The pate has no flavor itself and can come in either blanc or noir or rouge, but I've only tried the first two and only liked the white one. They also have a kimchi like fermented pate blanc and that was pretty gross, too. The cheese is okay if it is fresh (I can't remember what it's called), but if it's a few hours old it is waaay too sour and I can't really choke it down. The salads I've had here are awesome; just lettuce, tomato, and onion with egg halves and some sort of really light mayonnaise sauce. It's tasty! And they also had some fried potatoes today that were delicious and the best fucking croissants I've ever had are served during our coffee and tea breaks here at the hotel but I'm not sure if they're a staple item. They don't really do dessert here, which is a bummer, but I had an oreo today from another volunteer who brought them with him. Tres delicieux. I'm really curious about what my host family will be cooking for me tomorrow night. They know I'm a vegetarian and apparently it's not a big deal to let them know what I like and dislike. Well, I think I can say that in French. Je l'aime or je ne l'aime pas.

I can't remember if I mentioned it, but the ipod is in working order, thanks to monsieur Colt S. Sellens. Merci, mon amour. <3 Speaking of all that, there is one other engaged person here, a guy named Scott, who has only been dating his lady since March! So...whoa. I know a few people are in long term, committed relationships, too, but besides the married folk, I am pretty sure mine takes the cake. When people find out they immediately express their support if I decide to ET (early terminate). Those comments would annoy me if they weren't so close to the truth of how I've been feeling sometimes!

But come on! I bought a cell phone! Tres cool, non? I just WISH WISH WISH my babyluv had a way for me to get in touch with him...Since it will probably be several days before I even get a chance to post this. Ahhh, nothing is reliable here or easy to plan around.

But hell, TIA, man, TIA.

Elaina

PS. TIA means "this is Africa" for all of you who have not seen Blood Diamond or anything else related to foreigners in Africa...

PPS. It is actually like that here. You should watch M. DiCaprio in that if you want to see where I am. That's in Liberia which is a bit northeast of here, but it's basically a good depiction of West Africa.

PPPS. I have not yet lost the African gamble. Google it. That's all I have to say about that.

PPPPS. If you want my phone number in l'Afrique just message me on facebook or email me. Don't post on my wall something you really want me to read and respond to, bc I'll only have time to do that in extreme situations of free internet time. So let me know and I'll get you the digits or you can get them easily enough from ma mere if you can get in touch with her sooner than I'll be able to check online again! I love and miss you all and thanks for reading =D

E

*I don't have a huge salary. I was being sarcastic. I make 94,000cfa a month which is a bit less than $200...which will still be one of the highest paid in my village, but is definitely not enough for Cotonou or Porto Novo shopping sprees. Oh well.

July 22^nd, 22:34pm Benin time, 4:34pm CST, Porto Novo, Benin

This is the second night I’ve stayed at my host family, the Hounzounkou family. They are all really nice and want to help me with my french, which is painfully bad when put into a situation where the only thing I can speak is the language. There is a mama, a papa, a big brother, a younger brother, a big sister, and a younger sister who all live in the same house with me, but there is another mama and at least one or two other youngish girls who all live in the same family compound in a different area I think. My host maman who I see the most is really nice and speaks English, but she said she wasn’t going to let me use it at all and I heard her telling the kids to go talk to me in french, haha. The older sister, Amelie, is also nice, but very direct. She doesn’t smile unless you are having a conversation with her. She is 17. Ricardo is 12 and he is my favorite so far. Genevieve is 13 and she is also really nice. The papa said in English last night when he came home from work “you will pass a good time with us!” so that made me laugh. I only talked to him for a little bit because I am really tired pretty early and I don’t think he always stays in this maison. I think it’s a little like Big Love, lol.

Tonight after dinner (a huge salad with beets and lettuce, cucumbers, carrots, and eggs on top of spaghetti with a mustard viniagrette sauce. Actually not too bad, but definitely weird lol. But there were pineapple pieces on the side that were the best freaking pineapple I’d ever had like ever. Like actually it might have been the best fruit I’ve ever had. And since I really like fruit, that means it was like one of the best tasting pieces of food of my life. SO GOOD.)....so after dinner, both mamans and Ricardo, Amelie, Genevieve, and another sister who maybe doesn’t live here, but maybe does, but I think she might be the daughter of the other maman, Estelle, hung out in the huge livingroom with a chandelier and watched an Argentinian soap opera that is dubbed in French. I sort of tried to study my french, but mostly listened and tried to catch stuff.

Basically if someone speaks slowly and directly to me, I can understand like half of what they are saying. The rest of the time I am primarily lost.

Amelie walked me to the school where I have my lessons this morning. I studied French all day pretty much and got some rice and beans with tomato and onion sauce for lunch from an apparently reputable vendor. It was fine, but I really need to lay off the carbs. Whew.

Tomorrow I have school at the big compound place called Songhai that is really nice. It is far away from my house and I am like 90% sure I have to take a zemi to get there which will be...interesting. But I have my helmet! J’ai un cas!

Ok, I am exhausted and SO HOT. There is no air in my bedroom. I REALLY need a fan. Or I am going to die. NEED AIR!

I am attempting to boil and filter my water tomorrow. So far, I’ve lasted on three huge water bottles from the hotel, but that is running out and it is time to get down to business.

Oh, I guess I should say that I have electricity, but no running water. There is a well where I get my shower and toliet water from and I bring it inside and then use the plumbing like normal, but pour the water in. Sort of like dad’s house when the water would get shut off lol. I took a bucket bath today and actually found it surprisingly pleasant; I was very conscious of each drop of water that I was using and really felt intellectually stimulated by the process. We’ll see if it gets old.

Oh! Also, the YOVO YOVO song business has started. I LOVE it and think it’s adorable, but other people really hate it and get annoyed. It’s just little kids, but whenever they see us, they start chanting in a sing song voice, “yovo, yovo, bonsoir. Ca va bien, merci.” And it was totally stuck in my head all day. It’s pretty cute. They get these huge smiles on their faces and start clapping and jumping up and down and grab their friends, calling out the words. They just seem so happy to see us! I don’t think my own mother is ever that happy to see me! Haha

Ok, I like it here, c’est tout! Je suis fatiguee!

Elaina Hope

Friday, porto Novo, 7:16CST, 1:16 Benin

I MISS COLT and this internet SUCKS. waaaaaaa

C'est tout =(

E

Staging Update!

'Allo tout de monde! I apologize in advance for the length of this one! It includes both Saturday and Sunday and a bit on Monday!

Saturday: July 17th
I am right now charging my netbook by using an African converter attached to my computer's adaptor in my tiny hotel room in Cotonou. By the way, my computer's name is Madnessinlove which makes me happy everytime I log on.

So I'd like to finish updating about my experiences so far since I was cut off at the bureau yesterday.

Cotonou is awesome. It honestly looks like every African city that I've ever seen on cinema. The roads are sandy and broken, the traffic is crazy, there are low brick buildings surrounded by all sorts of tropical looking plants and trees. There's an element of poverty, although I get the feeling that this city is one of the wealthier areas of the country. Apparently we're near a quasi-swanky locale where all the expats live in the nicest Beninois maisons around.

Before getting to use the internet at the Bureau and talking to Colt (hereby also referred to as either my babyluv, tiger, puppy, Coltibear, or Cranbull...don't ask), I had my FRENCH TEST. That sounds much more intense than it actually was. I went into a tiny little library and chatted with a guy named Habilub. He's one of the language coordinators and he asked me a bunch of questions that I stumbled around with my awful francais. Mostly we talked about my fiance (just because "fiance" is one of the few french words I can remember and I was super glad to be engaged in that moment because I definitely don't remember how to say "boyfriend") and he also asked about my future plans which was fun to talk about. Then I got to ask him about his family; he has two super young daughters that he just lit up about when he answered my question. It was sweet. I sort of wish I didn't do so well because it will be easier to move up a level if I'm placed a little lower than my actual ability than it will be if I am placed right at or slightly above my level. I am predicting either novice high or intermediate low as my initial placement. I will definitely have to reach intermediate high, though before swear in. If we originally place at or below novice mid than we would only have to get to intermediate mid to swear in. So, zut! We'll see.

On my way to purchase credits to use on a current volunteer's cell phone, we decided to stop by Western Union to exchange some dollars. We went with another volunteer who has been in country for a year and she helped us navigate the system. While I was getting the money exchanged, the woman doing the transaction asked (in French) for 50 cfa, which I didn't have and K, the PCV, told her we didn't have it. The woman grumbled about and I asked K what was up. K than explained in English that she probably wanted to keep the extra money for herself and that you have to be super aggressive and just play the game and eventually they'll get frustrated and just make the exchange. That seemed to be the truth because I got my $170 turned into 85,000 cfa a few minutes later ($1= 500cfa). I was totally shocked to hear K talking about this woman right next to her and I realized that she was assuming that the woman did not speak English. So I asked if anyone speaks English and K just laughed and said that sometimes men on the streets know enough to say "I love you, marry me, take me back to America!" It's interesting because I've never been in a situation where people around me don't understand what I am saying; it happens the other way around a lot, though! Especially lately, when so many people are practicing their French around me!

So I was officially called a "yovo," meaning "foreigner" or "white person". And I was called it by another yovo! On the way to Western Union, the few of us pased by a group of white, European tourists who pointed and said "yovo yovo" as we crossed paths. I am sort of excited to hear the song sang by the kids (and, apparently older men to taunt us young women). K sang it as we walked back to the Bureau and it's more of a taunt or chant than a song. I can't remember it very well, but it's something like "yovo yovo, ca va bien merci, donnez moi un cadeau."
In other news, I am soooo happy that I brought my own pillow. The one they gave us at the hotel is lumpy and hard. It seems like a small thing, but trust me. It is nice to be able to almost smell my bed with my babyluv and the fluffy. I'm also glad I brought my own sheets, but I probably won't use them until i get to my homestay family's house in a few days. The hotel ones suck, but i can handle it for a bit.

Our schedule is looking pretty booked solid all the way until...about September. Haha. Until Wednesday afternoon we're here in Cotonou (that's 3 more nights as today is Sunday) doing logistical stuff, learning about the zemijians (the motorbikes that we'll use basically as taxis when in the cities), taking malaria pills (we don't start the mefloquine stuff that gives crazy dreams until homestay), learning about girardhia (it is also sexually transmitted, who knew?), and getting a slow introduction to Beninois food and culture while getting to know each other better. Wenesday we head out to Porto Novo where we will meet our host families and spend the night with them.

I hadn't actually eaten any hardcore Benin food until dinner last night because the two previous meals they'd offered it I had either been asleep or locked in my room. Yeeah, I'll explain. Friday night I fell asleep after we arrived and I cried into my pillow for 20 minutes, breakfast is just tea and croissants (omigosh, though, they're the best croissants I've like EVER had, all soft and crumbly and buttery I've eaten like 7 of them haha), and then for lunch they had traditional food, but yesterday I managed to get locked in our room which locks the inside when you lock the outside and my roommate had left and taken the key and no one heard me call for her to come back haha. So I just wrote in my coltjournal (they're like journal entries, but addressed to colt as a letter and I'll give him the book as a gift when i get back) and hung out in the room until she came back after lunch to let me out. I also had a snack around tea time, but it was just like a buttery, cheesy croissant thing. I have not been very hungry, though. Traveling takes a lot out of me and I'm definitely jet lagged.

But I had lunch today! Yay! It was...interesting.Couscous with sauce and meat on the side with bread. I skipped the meat and had this interesting fried cheese stuff. It’s pretty gross, but I might be able to get used to it if I really need protein. The couscous was good. Dinner was macaroni and a tomato and onion sauce stuff with meat and you guessed it, bread. I think I'll need some getting used to it, but I can live with it. And when we filled out homestay forms, there was an option to check vegetarian, so I think I might get accomodated with my host family. I am super nervous to meet them. I hope they are a good blend of caring and independent. I definitely need my own space, but I want to be able to get support when I need it. I should be able to update soon after I find out about my host family on Wednesday, but I'm not totally sure about access in Porto Novo.

Cotonou, though, is bad ass. The Bureau is so cool. K, the PVC from yesterday, is currently in the process of moving to Cotonou to act as a PCVL (Peace Corps Volunteer Leader). PCVL's run the 4 PC workstations around the country and act as support for PVCs. It sounds pretty sweet, especially considering the regular internet access and cool administrative duties. It's a long way in the future for me at this point in my PC life, but that sounds wicked to me.

Another thing that seems awesome is serving as a married couple. There are two in country now and two more that just arrived in my stage. They are all so freaking adorable it makes me soooo angry and at the same time I am drawn to them for some reason. I made friends with a couple from Minnesota who actually sort of look like colt and me. It's a little weird actually. It's nice because you've got a built in buddy, a support system in place, someone to bunk with and share the experiences with. It really makes me jealous and I spent about an hour yesterday plotting a way to get Colt to come with me somehow. But alas, it isn't possible. The only way it would happen would be if we go later and I quit now. I'm not a big quitter and things have just started. If I'm miserable for 8 months straight, though...after training and after checking out post for 6 months...and I still am having a really hard time, well, then maybe I'd quit. I just wouldn't leave now unless I was sure I didn't want it, and there's no way to know that until i get to my post site.
So I am having fun now and just going with the flow, day to day. I'm worried the pace of life might be too slow for me. I don't like hanging around with nothing specific to do. i guess I could read or work on my novel. Hmmm, a nap sound pretty nice. Haha, maybe a slow pace will work afterall, lol.

Anyway, I suppose that's all for now. Not much different today than yesterday. Shots and talks! =D Oh, and i have yet to see a mosquito, although everyone is hyper aware of malaria and there is standing water all over the place. I'm sure I will soon enough, especially since one volunteer the first night whispered ominously, "you WILL get malaria." Greeaaat.

With love,
Elaina

Sunday: July 18th

Bonjour! We got our French assignments and I am in the intermediate group as expected. There are 6 groups in my sector (health), and I am in the third one. So I’m definitely not the worst, but I’m certainly not the best speaker. I need to improve a lot and I am not really looking forward to that. Ugh.

I am definitely making friends. I really like the married couple that looks like me and colt.
I was not as sad today as I have been; Africa is like mad cool and takes away some of the missing my family and babyluv feelings. I have been writing a lot in my coltjournal and sharing my feelings with other people to help get out the sad! Haha, it seems to work. We played frisbee a bit today.

Today we talked about Katie, the volunteer who was killed last year. The official people couldn’t really give us any information, but the current volunteers gave us the low down on the events around her death. Since I am responsible for what I put on this blog, I don’t want to talk about an ongoing investigation to the world, but feel free to ask me about it if we’re talking and I’ll relay the info. It was interesting to say the least and I am definitely safe here, so no worries! It was an isolated and very specific instance.

We went a walking today around Cotonou and saw some sights. Bought ice cream (who knew??) and talked a lot in French with the language instructors. I am really trying to not hate this language, but I really just wish I could speak it well enough to get by. Ahhhhh, I hate learning languages! But it’s definitely necessary. Gaahhh.

No cell phone yet, but I borrowed someone’s phone again to talk to Colt for like 8 minutes today. I want to call other people, but it’s so expensive that I really have to wait until I have my own phone and credit to use which HOPEFULLY will be tomorrow. There are a few sympathetic volunteers who said they would try to help us out. I’m seriously going crazy without access to regular conversation with him. Honestly, if they try to put me somewhere without phone service I will probably either refuse to accept that post or quit early once I try it out. I have got to be able to discuter avec mon fiance!

I decided not to drink here. Everyone kind of goes nuts with the alcohol and I am just not sure if I’m using it in the right ways...I don’t want to self medicate, you know? So, no alcohol until I feel secure and happy with everything. Maybe that won’t happen at all, so for now I remain a teetotaler.

Tomorrow should be fun. I hope. We have specific project discussions with the people in our sector (there’s SED/IT, RCH, EA, and TEFL) and that is all morning. After lunch we are heading to the Bureau for APCD interviews where we will give our preferences for posts (I WANT PHONE SERVICE AND ELECTRICITY! AND EASY ACCESS TO INTERNET!) and we will also learn about the zemis. I’ll get my helmets and get fitted for my bike, as well. When we aren’t doing those things, we’ll have a lot of down time, enough so that I can upload this blog entry and get on facebook and stuff. I really want to be able to facebook chat or skype chat with colt or even actually video skype with him, but I hear the connection doesn’t really work very well for that, so hopefully i will get some message to him and my fabulous family. I tried emailing mom and dad; haven’t had time to check for a response.

I guess I should sleep now. I am going for a run tomorrow morning with the married couple and another older volunteer. Whoo! Tomorrow when i put this online, I’ll try to give a quick update as well. I miss you all and hope you’re having fun! Please email me and tell me what you’re up to! elainahope@gmail.com!

I’M IN AFRICA HOLY COW,
Elaina

PS. MY IPOD IS FROZEN. How do I fix it???? It is so sad because I really really really want to listen to music that reminds me of KANSAS and LOVE. PLEASE HELP. FACEBOOK ME or SOMETHING.

Monday

Hey y'all! I'm in the PC Bureau right now updating. The internet makes me nervous so I want to post this huge entry before I update again. If I have time I will do another post, but we're doing trainings and interviews and stuff so I'm not sure. At any rate, I am thinking I won't get a phone today...maybe tomorrow, but my fit throwing isn't really working, so honestly it might not be until Porto Novo. Ugh.

If I don't get to get on here again, I meet my host family on Wednesday night, woo! I'm excited to meet them and hope they have cute kids.

Au revior,

E

A quick hello from a summer afternoon

I am sitting here next to C while he sleeps and I am finally ready to really process this whole Peace Corps thing. I've spent the last two weeks digesting graduation and finding some sort of semblance of a summer routine here at the apartment. I finally put up my pictures from the last semester at Swells and for me that was very cathartic. End chapter.

And now I have 34 days until I leave for staging in Philadelphia. I have several plans for things I want to do before I leave and several things I need to get completed in order to be ready. On the unpleasant side is the task of figuring out loan deferments, packing up all my belongings into 8 totes to be stored with my mom, and saying good-byes to family and friends. On the pleasant/exciting side is packing, buying a netbook, spending a lot of time with C and family, cooking ridiculous amounts of deliciously fattening food and not caring about my weight, running, and just hanging out and not worrying about anything. I've also been going to a lot of movies and spending my money like it's going out of style.

I need to create a comprehensive packing list here in the next few days I think so that I can plan my luggage and make sure I have everything I want and need to bring with me. I'm planning on having a lot of clothes made in country, so what I am really interested in is cooking supplies, comfort items, and toiletries.

Well, I don't actually have much else to report. My paperwork is all completed and I'm just waiting to hear from placement about the specific details on staging. Until then, it's relax and procrastinate! Just kidding...sort of =D

E