What I'll Miss About Benin (and what I definitely will not miss!)

I have just under 24 hours left in Benin and I've been thinking a lot about my time here over the last year and a half and what I've really come to love and those things that really drive me crazy. I don't know if I'll miss all these things right away or if it'll take months or even years for me to have a craving for something on the list, but who knows? Here it is, my two lists. Warning, it's pretty long.


Things I’ll miss about Benin:

-the sound of women pounding yams at dusk
-the five times per day call to prayer at the mosques around Djougou
-the sound of the rain on my tin roof while I’m laying in bed
-riding on the back of a zem at night with the cool air rushing by
-seeing and wearing colorful fabric and fun outfits everywhere
-women carrying baskets of whatever on their heads
-cute, free roaming, bratty Beninese kids (even though they annoy me, too!)
-adorable baby goats and chickens running around
-yam pilee…sooooo delicious
-wagasi…there are no words for how awesome and unique this food is
-a cold, refreshing beer after a crazy hot day, especially with other PCVs
-hanging out and venting with other volunteers
-the excitement of making American food and drinks with other volunteers
-watching movies at the Nati workstation
-ordering fries at the Nati workstation
-hanging out with my Beninese friends, just sitting or making small talk
-teaching sexual health and seeing the look of understanding in people’s eyes
-greeting strangers on the street
-French, especially Franglais, the combination of French and English
-random sayings like ‘bon assise, bon travail, bon douche.’ It’s just so friendly!
-constant sunshine and feeling like summer (although Chaleur sucks)
-Zaari and cuddling with her…omg, I can’t even think about her, too sad!
-sitting out in my back porch at night smoking a cigarette and looking up at the stars in total silence, feeling small and awed by the world and my place in it
-long runs in the African bush, the red dirt dusting my shoes
-mango season
-joking around with my work partners
-the camaraderie between volunteers and shared experience of living in Africa
-being the center of attention, someone always interesting and worth talking to
-inexpensive and simple living
-lizards running around like squirrels
-the colorful craziness of the market place
-the awesome tan lines on my feet from my Chacos
-the simple joy of eating a good meal and watching an episode of How I Met Your Mother
-the excitement of others when I speak Dendi, the local language
-not having to shave and just being a dirty hippie
-Harmattan, the windy season, and the fires late into the night, burning on the horizon
-the poignancy of the first, cooling rain of the season
-feeling like I’m making a difference in people’s lives, sometimes in unintended ways
-crazy, unexpected setbacks and the lessons learned (although it is very frustrating, too!)
-feeling like I’m part of something bigger than myself

Things I won’t miss about Benin:

-13 hour bus rides in the heat surrounded by BO and noisy chickens and babies
-constant sexual harassment
-extreme pollution and trash everywhere
-Chaleur, the hot season
-frequent power outages and water being cut
-screaming babies and children
-seeing kids get beat and generally abused
-seeing malnutrition and poverty related illness
-feeling ultimately useless in the big picture of development
-waking up hot and sweaty and gross
-always feeling dirty, never perfectly clean all over
-not being able to cool off or stop sweating after a run even hours after a cold shower
-having my privacy constantly invaded by neighbors and kids
-never being able to be anonymous or walk around without getting called out
-YOVO, YOVO, BONSOIR, CA VA BIEN, MERCI!
-getting called "yovo", "batoure", "anasara", "blanche", "blondie", or "mademoiselle"
-pretty much everything in Cotonou except for the good food and workstation internet
-the subtle pressure from some other volunteers to drink and party heavily
-feeling inadequate as a volunteer and aid worker
-boring and carb heavy food options
-constant sickness and diarrhea and constipation
-having to filter water and always be conscious of how safe the water is
-bleaching vegetables to have a fresh salad
-doing laundry by hand
-bugs and spiders and having to spray and kill them
-mosquitoes and weekly malaria prophylaxis
-constant boredom
-missing friends and family and feeling guilty for being so far away
-LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP and all the crappiness that goes with it
-getting physically grabbed at the market place
-the bureaucracy of the Peace Corps
-feeling stranded at post or frustrated with outside communication or internet
-casual cruelty to animals
-the informal attitude toward time and keeping appointments
-hearing creepy rustling sounds at night and freaking out about what it could be
-sunburns and worrying about getting skin cancer
-gross, always dirty and cracked feet
-fearing for my safety on crazy taxi rides
-being frustrated at the slow pace of life (although I’ve learned a lot, too!)
-having to discuter for prices
-feeling lonely and homesick
-being constantly asked for gifts and money and to be taken to America
-Nescafe. That stuff is nasty. I don’t care how desperate you are. Just say no.

Oh, Benin. It's been life changing and amazing and I wouldn't trade it for anything. But I am ready for a change! I'm not sure if I'll be back on this blog except to post my DOS, but if you'd like, you can keep following my life journey, here at my medical school blog on wordpress.

Keep on rocking!

Elaina

I'll be home for Christmas

Well, it's official! I am leaving the Peace Corps a few months early to go home, help my family out, and make some money before medical school. The decision was definitely a tough one and one I analyzed for a long time before calling the Peace Corps to set it up, but ultimately it's the best thing for me and my family right now. Essentially it came down to the fact that I was going to have to ET anyway, probably in April, and why should I wait around for five months, get back into a routine, and be frustrated and miserable when I could make it home for the holidays? The Peace Corps does not make it difficult to early terminate and once it comes down to a need to ET for grad school, a few extra months seem superfluous in the long run. Sure, I feel a little guilty about leaving my projects and work partners behind (and I am close to traumatized about leaving Zaari), but everyone has been very understanding, especially of the fact that in reality, it's only a few months earlier than expected.

The next couple weeks will be spend filling out pages and pages of forms, figuring out packing and getting Zaari to her new home. She will be going to the home of a PC homologue who has many kids who love animals. I will be able to get updates on her through my Djougou post-mate and in the end, staying here is what is best for her (even if it makes me cry at night haha).

The last year and a half has been completely life altering and amazing and I wouldn't trade it for anything. It had its ups and downs, but doesn't life? Overall, I was happy and feel like I've both done some amazing work here and made many lasting friendships (cue cheesy music now). I'll miss a lot of people, but I would have been saying good-bye in a few months anyway, so I guess it's just ripping off the bandaid early.

All that sad stuff said, I am so incredibly excited to be going home! I'm looking for jobs in tutoring, being a nanny or long-term babysitter, or working as a receptionist at a medical office. I've already applied to over 20 jobs and hopefully I'll start to hear back soon. Apparently moving is sort of expensive...as is getting married and starting a household...(who knew? haha) so I'll be trying to save up as much as possible in the next few months before the wedding and med school.

I also just want to say that there have many times when I've wanted to leave, usually for very emotional reasons not backed by real logical ones. I've missed America and my family and Colt, but I've held out because I'm strong and determined and have never been someone to quit something just because it was hard. While ETing now does indeed solve some of those feelings (completely normal feelings that almost every PCV deals with on occasion), me leaving now is not due to emotional reasons. Right now it's about logic and finances and being a part of my family. Once I reached this point of clarity in thinking about my options, it actually wasn't that stressful of a decision. Ultimately, I'm not upset or struggling with the choice because I've put in enough time for me, personally, to feel accomplished and satisfied with my work and life here. Before I was always worried about regretting the choice later in life, which was a major deterrent to leaving. But now, at this point, with only a few months left, I know that I will have no regrets, only good memories! It helps that everyone I've talked to is supportive and in no way do I feel like a quitter. I loved it here and feel like I'm ending things on a good note at a good time for me.

Benin, it's been real. Stay classy,

Elaina

PS. I'll probably be back on to give a few ET updates for interested people and I may update again once I'm permanently back in the states. I can't believe this blog is ending! It's been such a big thing in my life for a long time now and it's going to be weird. I'll link my new, med school blog here and again in my final post. Yay, for turning the page!

gone to look for America

So I'm leaving in five days for my trip to America. I'll be visiting 5 different med schools, giving Peace Corps talks, eating American foods, and going on dates. I am unbelievably excited about this trip! Before I go I have to get my house keys copied for my new post mates, find 6 weeks worth of food for Zaari, pack, and clean my house.

The last few weeks here have gone by incredibly fast. I lead the science classroom at an art and science camp, helped talk about and put in contraception devices, talked about HIV/AIDS and helped with testing, did end of the month reports, went to the swear-in of the new volunteers, made untold numbers of cakes and pies and cookies, discovered that I'm not as gluten sensitive as I thought, got my wedding venues booked, changed my wedding colors, changed my wedding colors again, planned my new tattoo, red like four thousand books, watched Avatar a hundred times, fretted over med school application stuff, found out my stepmom is pregnant with a baby girl, said good-bye to sooo many volunteer friends ETing and COSing, lost 20 pounds, became vegan and gave it up, tried again, gave up smoking, wrote four chapters, learned more Dendi, and planned my first date night out in Kansas for the 30th. It's been a whirlwind.

Anyway, I'm so ready to go home for a while and just take a break from Benin. I also have a lot of work to do while I'm home but I have no doubt that I'll thoroughly enjoy myself as well. I'm really worried this time about reverse culture shock, but I think I'll be happy enough after a couple days. Pizza? Movies? Air-conditioned gyms? Yeah, I think I'll do just fine.

Camp GLOW Bohicon and gluten free peanut coconut cupcake!

So we just finished up camp GLOW (Girls Leading Our World) in Bohicon. The Wiricks ran it and it was beautiful. I feel for the first time in a year that I can actually see the difference I'm making in people's lives here. I mean, my group, the red team, was just absolutely inspiring. My mind was blown in a totally awesome way. I'll just let the photos speak for themselves.

It was amazing and I got so close to my girls. I miss them now! They were so smart and motivated to change the world and be feminists! <3

I got my first med school rejection...and then I got rejected at my dream school, the University of Chicago. So...in order to cheer myself up, I needed to make a cupcake. So I did. A delicious, gluten free peanut and coconut cupcake with chilled brown sugar coconut icing.

classy in the old tomato paste can...but so fluffy!

delicious and gluten free!

before the frosting...crumbly but amazing

probably the best thing I've tasted since America

So there ya go. Life is good despite the med school rejection...which is totally lame but I'm over it. The science camp is in a few weeks and I'm starting to get excited about it. I get my own team again and am running a terrarium project and a solar cooker project. We'll see how it goes. I'm also making gluten free snickerdoodle cookies tonight at the Nati workstation. WHATUP.

Gluten Free, Camp Success, and the 4th of July: ONE YEAR IN (with photos)

Yeah, that title is ridiculous...but very descriptive of this entry!

First thing's first. I am decidedly gluten sensitive. I have experimented quite a bit with eliminating gluten products from my diet and found that all the symptoms I'd always thought were singularly lactose intolerance are linked with gluten intolerance as well. It's mild, but causes me a lot of discomfort. In the last month or two I've reduced and almost eliminated all gluten from my diet; those moments when I slip have been very noticeable. All in all, this is not that difficult to do here and basically just means I no longer eat bread, pasta or couscous. I still get plenty of yams, rice, potatoes, beans, and oats. People with Celiac Disease or high sensitivity to gluten should probably avoid oats, but I've never had trouble with them. Basically I'm going gluten free, or as close to it as I can. I just feel better all around. To celebrate, I made amazing, easy gluten-free peanut butter cookies in my dutch oven:

AHH, they were amazing and I couldn't even tell they were made without flour. One awesome thing about going gluten free here is the easy abundance of soy products. I can get tofu and awesome soy flour that basically can serve as a wheat flour substitute. These cookies have egg in them and I'm trying to be a good vegan, but that is definitely tricky here. In America, I'm going full out vegan, but for now, I'm just avoiding dairy, cheese, eggs and transitioning a bit. 

Going vegan for me is just going to be a great way to feel more connected to the Earth, to my particular brand of spirituality and philosophy, and to be healthy in a way that ecologically and economically impacts our planet and the animals in it. I don't know if I'll be vegan forever, but I think this time I'm really serious about it. When I get back to America for good next year I'll be scoping out those cheese substitutes hardcore!

Switching gears, we just finished up with Camp Sucess up here in Djougou. We had 60 girls from all over the Donga region and we spent the week talking about empowerment, sexual health, healthy relationships, self-esteem, staying in school and not getting pregnant. 

It was great to see the girls making plans and becoming friends. I spent a lot of the week doing general help, running all over Djougou getting supplies and making sure everything ran smoothly. I also had my fair share of time with the girls and really enjoyed getting my hair done and dancing late into the night!

 My session was the sexual health one and I had a local midwife nurse from the health center come and talk to the girls about what sex is and how pregnancy happens...and how to avoid it! It went really well and I know they learned so much.

 I laughed more and was impacted more as a volunteer in Africa than I have been up to now. Camp was hands down the best and most moving experience of my time in Africa so far. 

doesn't Jared look adorable?

Anyway, immediately after camp let out, many volunteers met up in Djougou for the fourth of July celebratory weekend. The weekend included a huge soccer match against the Germans, an American football match (I scored a touchdown!), lots of beer, freestyle rapping, and an awesome rainbow.

Team America and Team Germany all together in harmony after the big USA win (1-0, my postie, Doug, scored the winning goal!)

This is a tiny sack filled with honey flavored sodabe, African moonshine. 

Doug eating a victory meal of pate blanche, sauce des legumes, and a cold beer

This rainbow circled the sun during the afternoon of the American football match

Post BBQ and post busting out some 4th of July themed rap fireworks.

I can't believe I've been here a year (well, in about a week). The new stage has arrived already and are all cozied up in their host families' houses. I've scheduled my mid-service medical exam for September, and am at the point where I can plan out my work for the rest of the year. I'm not really sure what I'll be doing after January, but until that point I actually have a lot going on!

Time has flown by a lot faster than I would have thought. And everyone says the next year goes by even faster. We've got some more ETs coming up, two people that I know of. That puts our total at fourteen people out of our original 59. At this point they said that it would be 20%. I didn't believe it then, but here we are, one year later. A year ago the idea of ETing was just terrifying, something that only people who couldn't cut it did...now, I see that each instance is very specific, very unique to that person. It isn't always a clear cut "oh, Africa/Peace Corps wasn't right for them" or even that it wasn't right for them "right now." Sometimes it just is right for a certain amount of time and then it's not anymore...things change, especially work situations. I can understand that. Who knows what the future will bring for the rest of us? A year is a long time...even if it passes by quickly!

Here's to us! We did it!

back to the blogosphere

I don't really like that word "blogosphere," but I suppose that's what this world is, a little sphere. I know that right now, while I'm specifically blogging about Peace Corps life, is the time when I will probably have the most followers, the most people who regularly read my thoughts about life. It's interesting to know that the scope of this blog has gotten pretty wide. In a lot of ways, that's exactly what I wanted. I wanted to share my experiences with the rest of the world. In other ways, though, it's a bit nerve wracking. Clearly, the powers that be ARE paying attention to what we write, and the idea of censorship just makes me feel pretty icky all over. Because I'm applying to med school right now, I don't want to mess with it, though. Part of me definitely feels that if the Peace Corps thinks something on my blog is inappropriate, med schools would probably agree, and so ultimately it's only a good thing that I am censoring myself, even if it came about through third party censorship. So really, in the long run, no harm done.

And the point of all that was to say: I'm not going anywhere! I'll stop the cursing and maybe think twice about posting negative thoughts, but other than that, I'm sticking around. I still have a lot of time left and a lot of things still to say about the Peace Corps, about Africa, about Benin, and about my life. And I know y'all are still listening, so thank you.

I'm updating my wish list to include more vegan, gluten-free items (more on that later...with a recipe and pictures!), and I'll be posting a few entries today and working on med school applications all day. I'm in Cotonou, just living it up. I live in Africa, man. And life is good.

A food post!

So it's been awhile since I posted pics up here and since I'm at the workstation in Nati I thought I'd drop by to post some of my favorite kind of photos: FOOD!

The food here is amazing, honestly. Most of the time I cook for myself in my little kitchen, lots of couscous, oatmeal, pasta with tomato sauces with onions and other random veggies. I also like to add soy cheese (basically tofu). I've started really getting into black eyed peas, too. They take a while to cook, but are so much healthier than a bowl full of bleached pasta. Every now and again I'll do something fancy, like make a pizza or attempt a dessert. I had a cookies phase...which is essentially satisfied by cooking in a dutch oven, very interesting. You can probably find a picture of one on the internet. Imagine that, but more ghetto and you've got my oven. I also used to bake my own bread, but I'm trying to lesse the carbs a bit if possible and trying to get into tip top shape. I figure I'll never really have this kind of time again to devote to it, so I might as well take advantage. That doesn't stop me from enjoying my watche, yam pilee, and wagasi, however. One good thing about yam pilee? It's not processed white, empty calories. You're actually getting some bang for your buck there in nutrients. Woo hoo!

Anyway, here's some food fotos:

Watche and wagasi. The watche is rice and beans and the wagasi is that fried cheese that is amazing and might be the only food I really actually miss. Must be eaten with cold, natural sugar coke. Ah.

This is mango pie. We made it up in Nati yesterday at the workstation. Mary is a genius. I had it for breakfast today and it was awesome.

This is from my three month "let's pretend I eat meat" phase. This was taken at Chateau Vert, an amazing chicken and fries place in Djougou across from my office. You have to order an hour in advance, but it's worth it. That's Colt on the side there, dipping his french fries in this delicious tomato and onion sauce they serve avec les frites ici.

This picture didn't load quite right, but it's the New Years cake Colt and I made when he was here. It's chocolate and amazing. Affissa tried it and thought it was fabulous. Ah cake. Thanks to Alex for providing the mix. It was loved.

Colt eating yam pilee for his last time in Djougou. He started getting pretty skilled at it by the end. 

Me eating yam pilee. The pounded yams are stickier than mashed potatoes and you scoop up the sauce (usually a tomato, onion, palm oil mix of awesomeness, occasionally with a peanut sauce that is my absolute favorite) with the piece of squished yam. If lucky, you'll also have a few pieces of wagasi to snatch up to make the perfect combo. And of course, a cold coke next to ya.

This is the coconut curry at Hong Kong's in Cotonou. This meal is like real Chinese food. I can sometimes be tricked into thinking I am in Americaland when I eat out in Cotonou. This meal was awesome...but so expensive I've never been back!

Colt at Livingstone's, the expat hangout in Cotonou. The pizza is expensive but real. I think it's good even by American standards, but I am a fan of thin crust pizza. Colt was unimpressed I think, but screw him. He can get Papa Murphy's whenever he wants! Ahhh, pizza. I blow some money here pretty much every time I'm in Cotonou. 

Not really a meal, per se. But this packet of barbecue sauce I got from Becca was a vrai delight on some watche. I wish I had some more. See how excited I am about it??

This was our delicious attempt at crispy potato soft tacos. The purple bowl is filled with chopped up and fried potatoes with taco seasoning. The green bowl has an awesome fresh salsa I made with guacamole, tomato, onion, and pimantes with a dash of lime and salt. The strainer has fresh, bleached, chopped up lettuce, those are definitely homemade tortillas in the back and we made a ranch-like dressing for the typical Taco Bell ranch sauce they put on top. We didn't have shredded cheese, but what do you want? Eggs in your beer? Geez.

Here we are pounding some yams for our dinner at Affissa's house. We pounded just long enough to get this photo, haha. Colt is such a dork.

Lapain and frites (rabbit and fries) et La President's in Porto Novo. This was the first meat I purposefully ate (there was the auspicious hot dog incident of 2008), and this rabbit was fabulous. I thought it was amazing and I wondered why I had been a vegetarian so long. Then I went to America and ate meat there for a month and wondered why the hell I would even bother eating meat in this country. So I'm a vegetarian again...after a short vegan stint in March and April. But that rabbit still looks good, huh?

Another Livingstone's pizza shot. I mean, Matt looks awesome, Scott is mid mouthful, how could I not post this pic? Eat that pizza, Matt!!!

Oh, wow, three Livingstone pictures. I mean, I thought this epic cheese string was pretty badass. And note my cool Beninese soccer jersey. Their team is the Squirrels. 

After all that food, pretty much we just go out for beers. It's the best staple of any good Peace Corps Volunteer's diet!

I hope you enjoyed the pictures! 

Mete Zaari?

Mete Zaari?

In dendi, that phrase means “how is your day?” Now, to me, it means “How is your new and awesome baby kitten?” Her name is Zaari and she is about 7 weeks old. Her birthday, then, I’m deciding, is February 5th. She is a light orange color with subtle white streaks and a pink nose. Her eyes are a sort of greenish blue grey color. She’s active and likes to explore, but because she’s from an African family, she’s still a bit feral. I’m taking her to the vet here in Djougou probably next week just to get her checked out and get rabies shots. If he’ll do it I’ll also get her spayed then, but she might be considered too young. Otherwise I’ll get her spayed as soon as possible; I only want ONE kitten.

I went to get her this evening when Imorou called me up and asked me if I was ready to go on a ride to get a kitten. I enthusiastically agreed, but was pretty skeptical of the whole situation when he showed up on his moto with a tiny cardboard box full of small holes. I asked him where we were going and he replied “Natitingou.” Which is like 30 miles away.

We ended up just riding for maybe 10 miles before pulling off on a side road and down a smaller twisting terre rouge. We ended up in front of what I later found out was his sister’s house. Three half naked children come running up greeting us in dendi and French and asking for gifts. Imorou, being the business sort of uncle that he is, just barks out an order and they go running off back into the house through the waving curtain that acts as a screen door. Seconds later they come bursting through with two terrified looking kittens.

One was a little plumper than the other. Both girls, I knew already I was going to have to change my name choice from Koyo since I had already planned that out as a boy name. The scrawny one was almost completely black with arrestingly blue eyes. The orange one was fatter, with grey eyes. They were both trembling with fear and when I set them down to see how they played with each other, they both joined forces and darted back underneath the curtain. I followed them inside and saw their mother, looking beat to hell, lying in a corner on the cement floor. Obviously still nursing, she seemed stressed and checked out. The black kitten was no where to be seen; one of the kids went off into the other rooms to look for it. The orange one, she was gnawing on the bristles of a broomstick that was laying near the mother, her fear already forgotten. Clearly it was not an ideal situation because generally I would have preferred happy kittens who liked to play and weren’t scared of people. But in this situation, I chose the fatter, slightly less terrified one.

The ride home was interesting. She definitely did not like her little box and tried to escape several times. It is not easy to carry a struggling kitten on the back of a motorcycle! But we managed to get to my house, buying a can of tuna for us both and a yogurt for me on the way. I immediately did what all the websites have suggested I do: put her in a closed off room with water, food, her bed, and her litter box and left her alone. She started meowing and crying right away, although stopped long enough to eat her tuna. I decided to replenish her food a bit, thinking that she probably wasn’t getting a whole lot of food back at the house. She ate all that, too. An hour or so later, I gave her more with a crushed up cherry tomato and she ate until she was full (and had a couple bites of the tomato, too). I am glad I don’t have to worry about her not eating!

For the first few hours I just let her stay in there; she quieted down after a bit and I chatted with Colt online while he prepped for his job interviews. It rained and thundered for a while and I was nervous about how she’d handle that so I went into the room and read a book on the bed while she explored (ie, stayed mostly under the bed). I talked to her softly, read out loud a bit and just got her used to me. I picked her up a couple times and petted her until she resisted and then set her down on her bed. She still didn’t really respond to me. I put my hand out before I left and she darted back under the bed. I was sad, so I left the room, feeling like we would never connect and she’d be scared of me forever.

I came in later to give her one last piece of tuna before telling her goodnight and giving up until tomorrow. Instead of hiding, though, she came right over to the bowl while I was breaking the fish into smaller pieces. Then I realized with a happy little jolt that she was actually purring! She leaned up against me just a little bit before she ate those last couple bites. Then she went over to her litter box and peed. Just like a normal cat! I just about died with happiness!

Of course, she promptly laid down and tried to sleep on her pee, so you know, I still have a ways to go. But, hey, I count that as a pretty decent start.

So, welcome Zaari. I really hope you don’t die anytime soon.

E

Happy New Year!

January 09, 2011
8:42pm

I have finally gotten back to my place after what has been a month of travels and holidays. Colt has been and gone, we’ve rung in the new year, my three month integration period is officially over, and in less than a week, my stage will have been in country for half a year. Before I delve too much into that whole passage of time thing, I thought I’d let everyone know that this Friday, the 14th, 20/20 is supposed to be airing the special on Kate Puzey’s death. Please tune in and someone send me a copy!

Colt was here for almost 15 days and it feels like we built a little life for us here during his time. Christmas morning was a blur of travel to Djougou and we basically showered and crashed into bed for several hours. I think he had been traveling for like 40 hours or something by that point. We woke up on the 26th and did our Christmas morning then. We took lots of ridiculously adorable photos and made dinner…tacos! Then we basically spent the rest of the week eating local food and watching an insane amount of 30 Rock and Inception (I almost convinced him to let me watch it a third time, but he convinced me to watch some Californication instead). We enjoyed each other’s company and fell into a lovely sort of routine that involved meeting up with some of my friends here, eating too much, and seeing my village. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. New Years’ was rung in with card games, cake, and champagne. Colt read Ender’s Game while I continued to gavage myself with 30 Rock and we started to get a little sick of each other. I think the constant cold showers started to get to him…no hot water and it is damn cold in the mornings here during Harmattan. We smoked some hookah on my roof the last day we were in Djougou and got yam pilee once more with cold cokes and then watched Pineapple Express and giggled like dorks while we cuddled. Ahhh. Then we stayed two nights in Cotonou where we just ate out at all the nice places I can never afford (Chinese, Thai, Lebanese, etc) and his last day we spent at the workstation while I was sick and throwing up for several hours (good timing!). He held me, though, and although we ended up not getting to go out to Indian food that night like we’d planned, it was nice to just spend those last hours alone and close. I did feel sort of guilty though…but I guess I shouldn’t have tried to be so macho and drink the shower water. That’s what I get haha. His flight left on the 7th late at night and he has safely arrived back home and had Christmas with his family. I sent a bunch of random African gifts for him to disperse to various people, just little trinkets and stuff, nothing fancy (I am so broke right now!). It was a wonderful visit, we took lots of pictures and videos, and hopefully the next 8 months and 3 weeks will pass by without hardly any notice at all! Yeah, we’ll see about that. =(

Hmm, let’s see…what else? Big projects are starting to get going now that I’m allowed to really jump into work…several girls and boys camp meetings are going on this month and I am going to get back into going to the health center regularly in addition to my time at the office. I need to get some scrubs made for the maternity so I can help with births, but until then I am going to help out a midwife nurse when she inserts IUDs and Norplant birth control. The Peace Corps has restructured some of its goals so that now what was my primary project (sexual health and family planning) is now technically a secondary project…so I also need to try to get more involved with the maternal health side and do more prenatal consultations and stuff with the midwives. In a really bullshit red tape move, the Peace Corps noticed that volunteers weren’t meeting family planning goals, so instead of giving us more training or directive, they just decided to abolish that program as a major source of focus, thereby making the stats look better, but not fixing the underlying issue. That’s just one example in a growing list of examples about Peace Corps administrative bureaucracy that seriously hinders volunteers’ ability to effectively work abroad. Sigh. Onto more pleasant things…

Er…yeah, I got nothing. Oh! Next month I’m going to Pendjari, the national park, with Andrew and Krista, Eric, and a couple other people. I had originally planned on going with Colt when he was here…but well, that didn’t work out. So too bad for him, I guess I’ll just send him a picture of the awesome lions I’ll see!

It’s hard to believe I’ve been here for 6 months already. Time has really flown by it seems and yet it feels like I’ve been here for soooo long. For some reason I can feel like I just boarded the plane from Kansas City a couple weeks ago and also feel like I’ve been here for years simultaneously. I guess it was the same thing in college; day to day felt insanely drawn out, but by the time I graduated, I felt like I’d just blinked and it was over. I do wish I would have savored my time at Wellesley a little more, but I think I did okay. Similarly, I think I’ll do fine here in my looking toward the future and yet relishing my moments in the present. I suppose there will a time when I look back on my service and wish that I would have just been more involved in the day to day small things and knowing that keeps me a little more grounded even though I just want it to be a year from now so badly. The time will come, though, and probably sooner than I think I’ll be saying goodbye.

And when I do…I’ll be a vegetarian again. Because right now…well, I’m not. Not exactly. I’ve decided to be an Afri-tarian. I only eat meat while I’m here in Africa. I’m just so protein deficient especially if I want to avoid palm oil fried wagasi. I’m also basically a vegetarian for economic reasons stemming from the commercial meat industry in the United States, which clearly does not exist here. So I’m eating fish and poultry which I haven’t eaten since 2004. The chickens here are all free range and crustaceans are basically just big bugs anyway. I’m actually sort of grabbing onto meat eating with gusto. I was calling myself a ‘meatatarian’ for a while, especially while gnawing the bones of a particularly tasty guinea fowl when colt was here. I’m planning on enjoying it while I can and reverting back when I finish up here, although there is something to be said about spending my money on free range meat in the United States as it adds an even more forceful economic incentive for companies to use humane treatment of their livestock. I’m not sure, we’ll see.

Moving on…Medical school packets for the advisory committee are due in a couple weeks so I need to really get cracking on that. Hopefully that will keep me busy enough to not count down the days until I see Colt again. I need to have an awesome application so I can go home to interview!

And speaking of that, I wanted to publicly declare that Colt and I are clenched into a competitive battle to lose weight. Whoever reaches their goal weight first gets to decide the number of children we’ll have in the future. This is not a decision he will get to make. Thus I must win. So please, no one send me pasta or sugar. If it’s in my house I’ll eat it, but if it’s not, then I will be the champion. Send Colt, however, lots and lots of goodies. I’ll update my wish list to include canned or packaged tuna and mints instead of chocolate and velveeta cheese…as much as that pains me.

I guess that’s it for now…things should start to get back to a semblance of routine, or at least as routine as is possible in Benin. For example, tomorrow is a voodoo national holiday and I don’t have to go in to work. Hello, Lord of the Rings marathon! My life is sort of awesome, yeah?

See ya when I see ya,

Elaina

Happy Holidays from Africa!

I am here at the Cotonou workstation and everyone is filing out, off to join friends and visitors in various beaches and cities throughout the country. There will still be a few of us in the workstation tonight and we're getting massages later today. I've been setting up my Pandora profile and listening to a lot of holiday music, but there's just something a bit...off...about the season here. It's the warmth, sure, but there's just no Christmas spirit in the air. Up north in Djougou, for example, there are a couple places with lights up, but for the most part, no one celebrates Christmas the way I'm used to. Back home, it's not really just a Christian holiday, it's an American holiday and means a lot more than just Jesus and presents...there's like an aura that fills the streets...and all the music and lights and tinsel and evergreen trees wrapped in stringed sparkles and golden ornaments? Man, that's just not here. Even in the South, where people are largely Christian and put up decorations around the cities, something is missing. There are cheap plastic toys with bright colors and lights everywhere, but it's almost like Benin has captured all the commercialism of American Christmas, but none of the goodwill toward others, love of humanity, doing nice things because it's the season for kindness, and just general Christmas spirit. Maybe it's just because it's still like 90 degrees outside? I don't know, I'm just really missing the smell of eggnog and cinnamon, snow and wintery breezes. I miss that moment late at night on Christmas eve when I sneak out of my room after everyone else has gone to sleep and I can just enjoy the last few minutes before the hectic morning. I sit quietly in the livingroom with all the lights turned off except the twinkling of the lights around the tree illuminating the brightly wrapped presents and casting shadows over the stillness. I love that, just sitting and feeling like there's something like magic so tangible I can almost touch it. That feeling is just. not. here.

But despite all that, I am pretty damn happy right now. Good friends, good drinking, I got some vanilla pretzels in the mail today, all is right in the world. I just watched "I just had sex" by the Lonely Island and I have to say, almost as good as "I'm on a boat." Not quite, but close.

Oh yeah, and Colt's getting here in a few hours. What now, bitches??!

Merry Christmas!!!

Elaina

IST

Interservice Training has been super boring and also awesome. We've been able to all see each other and hang out with dance parties on the roof of Songhai and Israelis, moto crashes, project designing tools, local language practice, practice sensibilizations, and very couth evenings of johnny walker red and coke. I must say it's been practical and interesting and amusing. Imorou is definitely the homologue who walks the walk and talks the talk which is not always as awesome as it sounds.

I had forgotten how muggy and humid it is in the south. it sucks. i had also forgotten how to discuter zem prices and deal with the super aggressiveness of the fon people. i miss djougou and my bed and shower although we are sleeping in air conditioning now.

i saw the host family and had more conversation with them than i did in like the 9 weeks i actually lived with them. i think my french has definitely improved ou bien i am just less terrified of speaking now and making crazy mistakes.

So I'd like to type more about this bountiful week but all i can think about is the fact that colt is on a plane right now getting ready to land in new york...and then he'll be IN BENIN with MEEEEE in like a day and a half (ok, it's precisely 31 and a half hours not like I'm counting down or anything).

We are going on safari, and rocking it in djougou and having soooo much...FUN!

So, yeah, I probably won't update or be on facebook or talk to another human being until 2011. So, sorry in advance and HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

love and miss you all, please send letters and chocolate,
xoxo
e

a light at the end of the tunnel

Things are looking up. Colt will be here in 29 days, the Harmattan winds have started bringing cooler nights and wonderful midday breezes, my french is almost always adequate in any given situation, and those damn baby goats are as cute as ever. I have a new found sense of duty after filling with patriotism post season two of the west wing. i am serving my country by living here, i am working toward international cooperation and peace by living with the people making little money and hand washing my laundry. There is honor in that and i am really starting to believe it. I thought I believed it when I applied, but Peace Corps applicants have no idea about so many things. I think it takes at least a good chunk of a year to realize how much you don't know and even more time after that to find the perspective that will foster effective work. I am at that point. I started so completely misguided and I had done my homework! I was as possibly prepared as can be expected from a well educated American 22 year old and rounding up to my fifth month here I am only now seeing that there might actually be a place for me here. I had to get lost in myself, in the dark, before I could see the possibility for something other than a cheap idealism. I have come full circle as it were, and i am just now understanding that there was something almost insincere about our desire to serve.

much ado about rien

ok, it has been a while. if i make some mistakes here it is bc of the french keyboard i am using at work. as some of y'all may know, my computer cord died. yes, the elecricity surged and my cord was plugged in...leading to explosion and dead cord. luckily my computer wasn't actually plugged in at the time...so i am entrain de waiting for a new one from dad...and apparently there are also dark chocolate peanut m&ms in the package; score. on the subject of packages; no i have not received yours; anyone's. i am going to the nati workstation soon and i will hopefully have a nice pile waiting.

Just for kicks, here is what it looks like if i type without cherching for the correct keys:

i just typed like q hourùs zorth of ,qteriql qnd of course none of it zqs sqved:::so i q, going to try to not throz q fit qnd just cql,ly try to re,e,ber zhqt i typed here qnd hope thqt i donùt throz so,ething out the zindoz in frustrqtion:

so i cannot really remember what i had written here...i have typed for an hour and published it and of course it didn't work for wharever stupid reason. aaargh, i guess i'll just give a mini update.

i have been running, i made a beninese friend who runs with me and helps me with my french...which has gotten a lot better, but still needs a lot of work. i have read like twenty different books including all the twilights, a david sedaris, some robin cook, a little john irving, a book about running, and a lot of my pathology textbook. i thought maybe not having a computer would induce some sort of ascetic like revelation about the spirit sucking technology dependant, but honestly i am just really missing watching californication and other movies. i LIKE technology, i like the internet; i like being connected to the world. give me an iphone or give me death!

as far as work goes, i still do a lot of sitting and waiting. i'm trying to not let it get to me; it's pretty typical for the first few months at post. i've been reqding my pathology book at work and people just say ''good work!'' whenever they walk by. i also spend a couple days at the maternité and hopefully i'll be helping out with births in a few weeks. the sage-femme (mid-wife) doesn't really know what to do with me; i'm not a nurse or doctor and can't speak particularly good french. hopefully that will get better as they get used to me hanging around.

i had been doing a lot of cooking, but i've been eating out a lot more. the wagasi on the streets is just so much better than i can make it especially with yam pilée and the couscous qnd omelette plate at this one cafetariat in town is fabulous. i have also discovered watchi, this delicious rice and beans combo that combined with savory wagasi is soooo freaking good. since i've been cooking for myself less i've naturally been sick a lot more. in the last month i've been sick enough for cipro at least twice although i think it's from the same salad place that got me sick on post visit. i'm going to keep eating out, but not go there and see how i do. since i'm all out of cipro now...seems like a good time.

i'm writing more since i am sans computer, working on my YA novel about fairies that i started last fall in my writing for children class. it so far has a suspiciously twilight tinged feel to it, but hopefully once i transcribe it to computer i can edit a bit of that out. i am writing in these little 80 page cahiers that are gridded like for geometry or high school chem and really hating the shitty cheap pens that are so ubiquitous here. someone please send me those four-in-one bic pens. they are my favorite and remind me of taking notes in organic chem and genetics.

i saw a facebook event ad for the wellesley sex carnival tomorrow and felt a surge of pride that the tradition continues. my beninese friend would pee her pants if she heard about that, haha.

well, i think that's it for now; i am really getting tired of this keyboard. i have a couple insanely cynical and depressing entries that i've written in the cahiers, but i think i'll save them for later. right now i am looking forward to some couscous, omelettes, and fries and life is good.

i miss and love you all, please send chocolate.

e

The Proverbial Roller Coaster of Emotion Post

August 18, 2:50pm CST, 20:50 Benin time

I finally just said screw it and took my computer out into the salon to type this while my family is around. My room is locked whenever I’m out and they’ve had volunteers in the past…and I also usually have my computer with me anyway. I just felt that the hassle of having to type in my hot room all by myself was not worth it; it’s much nicer to be out where there is a breeze and I can chat with the fam! They really loved seeing my tiny computer, too. They were cracking up when I showed them all the photos slide show style of my going away party. Maman said Colt was very handsome and I said I’d bring him by to meet them in December. The older uncle was very interested in the price of mon ordinateur, but whatever. Once I get to my house in Djougou I definitely won’t be making myself a target by letting anyone know about my expensive items, but I feel like I’ve been with this family for long enough that I trust them and I always lock my door anyway. It was a judgment call and maybe not everyone would agree with it, but just know that I didn’t make it lightly and I won’t do the same in Djougou.

Anyway. I thought I’d drop a line to just talk about something other than a simple update about my life and the activities that I’ve been up to. At this point, things are feeling pretty mundane and definitely routine. I still have those “whoa Afrique” moments, but I have gone at least two days where I don’t think specifically about the fact that I’m in Africa. So things are pretty normal for me at this point…which is a bit frustrating because in less than a month I’ll be packing it up to go to the opposite side of the country to start over with a new community, but c’est la vie, n’est pas?

I feel more like a manic depressive than I probably ever will again in my life, as one volunteer put it, and that is so true. Within the space of days or even hours, I can go from being completely elated to crying alone in my room. Some days I think “holy shit, I was like BORN to be a Peace Corps volunteer” and I am feeling totally high on life, and then just a little while after that I’m choking up because my host brother said something that reminded me of Lucas. So I thought I’d just make a couple lists of all the good and bad things that make me feel like I’m on the ol’ roller coaster.

THE BAD

-The smell of fish. My family makes it a lot and it is really strong and really disgusting and I cannot escape it in my room.

-The mosquito/other bug bites. I have scratched so much I worry that I might have scars when I’m done!

-Heat rash. Whenever I run/work out I get these little bumps all over my chest and shoulders where my sports bra has rubbed up against me and it’s ugly and itchy and annoys me!

-Constant YOVO-ing. I didn’t think it would bug me, but it kinda does. The kids are still cute, but adults annoy me. Sometimes I yell the word “mesoui” which means “black person” in Fon and they always crack up at that. That’s definitely not the correct spelling of that word and also probably not something I’ll continue with apres service.

-Missing the USA. Sometimes I miss my family or friends and sometimes I miss the food…often I miss both at once and I am super sad that I won’t be there for at least a year. Since I have to come back to interview for med school, I know I’ll be there next fall at some point, so that gives me some hope for a good pizza…or twelve.

-Missing Colt. It’s a special kind of missing that gets its own mention. It’s like the kind of missing where I wake up sometimes and I’ve been dreaming that I’m sleeping next to him and when he’s not there when I open my eyes, there’s nothing but a sort of crushing disappointment. Knowing that we can’t have a routine together again for two years is actually too overwhelming most of the time for me to think about. Instead I think about how he’s coming to visit in December and just think about it in baby steps. That works pretty well, actually. But I tell ya, some days I just feel BAD because of this one.

-Futility. Sometimes..okay, most of the time, I feel like there’s no way that I can possibly make any sort of difference during my time here. I feel like my choice to join the Peace Corps was primarily a selfish one and that it is incredibly naïve and paternalistic of me to think that I could possibly have any lasting impact here. Sometimes just the thought that the Peace Corps presence indicates substandard living, that me being here necessarily states that Benin is ‘not developed’, feels offensive to me. I don’t know. This topic deserves its own entry, but suffice it to say that my perceptions about what a “third world” country is have been a bit rearranged.

-Being hot all the time. There have been like 2 days where I had chilly moments. The rest of the time, I’m like constantly sweating. The temperature is not super hot all the time, but there’s just no escape from it. It’s like 89 degrees or something, which isn’t bad, but when you can’t get out of it…and it’s a mini sauna under the mosquito net…it sucks. The air conditioned computer room at the bureau in Cotonou is like heaven…and I’ve only been there once since I left.

-Bad internet connections. There are very few times when I am so frustrated I want to scream, but when I just want to post a blog or upload one freaking picture and I can’t because it’s such a bad connection, I want to hit someone or burst into tears or both simultaneously.

THE GOOD

-Receiving letters! Thank you so much to everyone who has taken the time to send me something (Rhonda, Zach and Lucas, Craig, Dana, and Ally, Mommoo!…I thought if I listed the names everyone else would feel un peu guilty and send something, too….haha…make sure to put an extra stamp in there so I can send one back to you!)

-When someone calls me “madam” on the street instead of “yovo.” I don’t mind the little kids singing the song, but it bothers me when adults, especially men being creepers, will say it to get me to come over and buy something. So when I hear a young adult or grown up call me madam I feel bien integre.

-Cadeux-ing something to a kid (gifting). I just like to give little things to kids I know, like the other night I gave the rest of my pineapple to Fifa, my littlest sister, and she was just so freaking psyched about it that it made me appreciate both pineapples and gifts so much more.

-The little goats. They are adorable and while they’re babies, I like them. The grown ups are kind of belligerent and ugly…but I guess it’s the same with people. There’s definitely a reason I want to be a pediatrician…

-A successful zem ride. One where we saluate each other well and we’re friendly and I don’t get overcharged or called yovo and the ride is pleasant and fun. After those zem rides I feel so much a part of the culture I could just pee.

-The tissue. It’s colorful and beautiful and it’s totally the kind of stuff I like to wear in the states already..but it’s everywhere and totally acceptable to have a bright pink and blue skirt/shirt ensemble.

-Rico. My host brother is awesome. He’s a little brat sometimes to his sisters, but he cooks me dinner and helps me learn how to cook Beninese food on the little tiny gas stove in Maman’s room and I helped him with his English homework…and he’s just such a cool dude. He makes me miss my brothers A LOT, but it’s nice to have a kid around that age to make a connection with. When he saluates with me I just feel a surge of happiness.

-Phone calls from home. Colt, mom, dad, whoever. When my phone rings I am sooo psyched!

-Waking up in the morning feeling like I got a good night’s sleep and not feeling too hot or uncomfortable. Sometimes just before my alarm goes off, I’ll wake up and feel really content, just feeling at a good temperature and like I’ve slept well. Those mornings I wake up and roll out my yoga mat and do some sun salutations avant le journee. C’est bon.

-Wagasi. If it’s good…and I actually have not had any wagasi since the hotel in Cotonou that I thought WASN’T good, it is really good. I’m not sure if it’s just the fact that it’s the seulment cheese I can get in Benin easily, or if it’s legit good…I sort of think the former a la veggie dogs in the states…but I really like it and when I get a repas avec some wagasi in it I am stoked.

-Random English songs. I hear them sometimes while I’m walking down the street or on the radio behind my house and every time I think “I totally know what that song is saying…and probably none of these people do!” It makes me feel kinda cool like I have a secret ability or something. A super power.

Ok, well that’s it for now. I’m happy to see that I have more good things than bad. I guess that’s why I’m still here, n’est pas? I met my postmate, Doug, today. He seems like fun guy and I’ve read his girlfriend’s blog for a year. She’s posted in Ze in the south, but comes up to Djougou once a month, so I’ll probablement be seeing her around un peu.

Friday we have our update language interview/test and I probably won’t get online again until after I know where I’m sitting. My goal is to reach my final level now (intermediate high) so that I can start learning Dendi, the most common local language in Djougou. I think I have a small chance of doing that, but most likely I’ll be put in intermediate low and have to continue with French, which would be fine, I guess since pretty much everyone uses French in Djougou. I am just sort of tired of French lessons and would like to learn something new. One of the volunteers said that I could ask to have some of my lessons perhaps be Dendi and the others be French, even if I don’t make it to intermediate high…so we’ll see. (On va voir) Wish me luck (bonne chance!)

I miss and love you all; send me stuff if you miss and love me too. I looove cadeaux. Also it’s my birthday in less than a month and it takes like a month for packages and letters to get here. Just sayin’.

E

internet on a monday??!

i am using a french key board right now at the small cyber cafe near the school we have classes at during the week. i have all my blog entries typed out on my computer but forgot my portable hard drive today. it's not too bad though because we are going to songhai tomorrow and i can update then. but these keyboards are crazy!

we find out our site locations on friday so i will try to get online before the following tuesday to let you know where i'll be for the rest of my time here after swear in in september. we are all really nervous and excited to see who will be near us (and thus become our better friends!)

things are good, the 50th anniversary of independence for Benin was yesterday and was a big party all over the country! we got to meet a lot of the other volunteers in the country and i even got to hang out with two volunteers who were finishing up their two years of service and heading back to the US of A. seeing them and their enthusiasm was very good for me; i will talk about that more in one of my 3 blog entries tomorrow!

i added my number and adresse at the top of the blog so ppl can get in touch with me easier. ok time for more french and bicycle training. woo hoo!

a demain,

E

Spiders, zemis, and yovos galore!

July 23rd, 3:50pm CST, 9:50pm Beninese temps, Porto Novo

Today was an interesting day. My host sister, Amelie, helped me call over a zemidjian, but it was not an 'official' one. The ones who are registered and have training wear blue shirts with identifying numbers on them and baseball caps. This guy had the cap but not the blue shirt, but Amelie flagged him down and negotiated a price before I could say anything...and I wasn't even sure at the time how to say that i needed the official ones. So I said, hey, whatevs, and je prends cette zemi comme personne avant moi. And of course everything was tres bien.

Apres l'ecole, I had to get a zemi back to the house, which was an interesting problem since I had really had no idea where to go. One of my (apparently two) host mamans explained where the maison was, but hell, I couldnt' explain it to a zemi. So luckily there was a current PCV hanging out a Songhai and she helped explain that my house was proche l'ecole Davie at the end of the road. The zemi said okay and I hopped on with my sweet ass helmet (ma cas). It was pretty embarrassing, though, because he kept asking me, "vous connaissez?" ("you recognize anything?") and I kept saying "non" (nope!). Finally he rounded a corner and I saw the gigantic pink mosque that is a block from the house (and the muezzin call goes every few hours...I haven't figured out the schedule, but I will not soon forget the dulcet sounds in the wee hours of the morning!). I told him to stop and then thanked him profusely while he laughed and I paid him the deux cent francs.

That whole laughing at me thing seems to happen a lot here and I'm sort of enjoying it in a strange way. I mean, some of this shit is pretty damn funny. For example, this evening there was a fucking huge spider in my room. And naturally, I have this aversion for killing spiders. It's not a "I love nature and don't want to harm God's creatures" aversion, but more of a "I don't want it to scurry away and hide or jump on me or touch me with it's freaky legs" aversion. So I contemplated this spider as he chillaxed on my hundred dollar Chacos. We were at an impasse for probably a good fifteen minutes. I considered going to find Amelie...then decided I needed to man up because there wasn't always going to be a nice African waiting for me to utilize her spider killing services. I prepared myself to kill it and then realized that it was sitting on my shoes that I would have otherwise used to smush it. I decided then that perhaps my petite problem might be funny and I could use it as a bonding experience since I have yet to bond over my impeccable francais. I grabbed my handy dandy french dictionary while keeping that deceptively still spider in my sights and then made my way through the giant maison to trouve Amelie. Well, Amelie just happened to be on her way out and I told her there was a huge araignee dans ma chambre and that I had fear of it. She seriously started cracking up when she saw it. Her laughter brought Ricardo running and that attracted the attention of Estelle and Genevieve and at least two or three other neighborhood kids who were all in the livingroom watching the french dubbed version of an Argentinian Days of our Lives...and they all laughed and jumped up and down and teased me mercilessly saying it was "tres petite" and Amelie smushed it with her hand and brandished it in front of me just as Maman entered my little room with a low chuckle...and what the hell else was i supposed to do but just laugh with them? I am still grinning like a dork now that they are all gone. But, shit, it was pretty big.

I'm telling you, life is pretty freaking hilarious.
E

Sunday, July 25, 9:02am Beninese time/3:02am CST, Porto Novo

I am officially ill for the first time in Africa. Yay! I think it is less an actual infection and more just getting used to the food, but I stayed home today while the fam went to church because something I ate yesterday did not agree with me and I feel pretty crappy.

I filtered and boiled my first batch of water on my own; I definitely had to pick out a floating ant this morning when I poured it into my water bottle...so...yum! I have 5 liters stored now which should last me a few days and I’ve filtered like 6 more liters that can be boiled and stored in a couple other water bottles. I wasn’t brave enough to drink it plain, so I added a pomegranite lemonade packet to it and it is bon!

In the spirit of doing new things, I fait les lessives hier...(did the laundry yesterday) which was pretty ridiculous. I asked Maman Ramone (the younger, 2nd wife who usually cooks and does most of the work from what I can tell) if she could show me how to do it and she said something really fast and gestured to the patio and after about 5 minutes of me trying to repeat back her words and her getting frustrated that I did not comprends, I finally burst out in English, “I’ll bring out my clothes and you’ll show me how?!” And she smiled and said “yes.” AHHHHHHHHhh, so annoying! So I brought out my laundry and she told Amelie to take me to buy a bar of laundry soap and then we spent like an hour doing half of my laundry. I soaped up a shirt and then scrubbed it hard and then she’d take it and do it, too and then rinse it and go hang it. She had this very interesting complex system, too, of buckets and water and savon (soap). I realized that as the rinse bucket would get more sudsy and the first couple wash buckets got more dirty, the rinse bucket would become an additional wash bucket and another bucket with fresh water would be added on to become the rinse bucket. After doing like 10 items, we had basically used 5 buckets. It was pretty cool actually and much more efficient than I would have been able to figure out on my own. But dang, my arms got tired! I told Maman that and she and Amelie cracked up. They let me do it by myself for a bit (because Maman said I had to learn because I’d be alone at post), but I don’t think neither she nor Amelie could handle how slow I was, haha. So Amelie helped me finish while Maman went to preparer mon diner. I think she said something about how I was going to help her do it next Sunday (but not today because she was going to Cotonou).

I visited Craig and Heather yesterday at their sweet digs. They are staying with an older couple with an adult son who lives there, but their other kids live in Paris. They are very successful and have a lot of money and servants (called domestiques) to cook and clean. It’s very different then my experience; they have the entire downstairs to themselves! I hung out there for a while and chatted about wedding planning and stage and found out from Heather that instead of the $200 per month that goes toward our readjustment allowance, we actually get $275 because Obama increased our budget. So instead of $6000 at the end of service, volunteers get closer to $7400! Sweetness. Craig and Heather are considering perhaps doing a third year, too, which pays a bit more...so when they COSd (Close of Service), they’d have total upwards of like 20 grand. WHOA, haha. See, Colt totally should have come!

So far, the bug situation is thus: GIANT spider, freaky huge moth thing on my door last night, cockroaches in the bathroom at night and one died there and I don’t want to touch it, millions of ants that I sprayed with bug spray and they freaked out...and I don’t think I mentioned it earlier, but THERE WAS A SCORPION! In the livingroom a couple days ago, I saw it and knew immediately what it was, but asked Amelie, pointing, “qu’est-ce que c’est?” and she saw it and jumped up and stomped on it with HER BARE FOOT! It was like a clearish, light brown color and about two inches long and they move soooo weirdly, like their whole body turns in a perfect circle. I asked Amelie afterward if there were a lot of scorpions here and she said, “NON. C’etait une seul” (“that was the ONLY one”). So apparently that was the only scorpion in Benin, so I should be good. Ha ha. But damn, she’s such a bad ass, n’est pas?

I talked to mom, zach, and lucas last night! Yay! The boys didn’t have much to say, but I told them a bit about where I’m living. Mom says they need more perspective to really get it, so she ordered Blood Diamond from Blockbuster. It’s not that VIOLENT here, so dont’ get the wrong idea! Everyone is super nice and in general, Beninese culture is very welcoming and open to yovos. That said, I did get a sexual invitation from a stranger the other day, haha. There’s a gesture that rude Beninese men will do to women when they’re shaking hands if they are beeing skeezy creepers; it’s like rubbing one finger against the woman’s palm during the hand shake. Anyway, there was some teenage boy outside the school who smiled and said good morning and offered his palm and I was with a bunch of other yovos and Peace Corps people, so there was nothing sketch about it, so I took it and he totes whipped out the dirty finger move. It’s really impolite and they know it is, so I just exclaimed “non!” and yanked my hand away before continuing on my way, which is what we’re supposed to do. So, yay! I get to check that one off the list. Another volunteer said it took her a year to get it, so I must just be very advanced haha.

I suppose there is some bad news to report. One of the trainees in the health sector has decided to early terminate (ET). Word on the street is that he really missed his boyfriend and being away from him made him realize how much he needed to be with him and that the work he would be doing here was not important enough to him to stay. So, that kind of shakes the resolve, you know? I heard that someone has a bingo card of all the trainees who are expected to ET and that I’m on the list...but I am pretty sure that all the people with serious relationships are on it. I mean, look. I know I can make it through swear-in in September and for a while at post for sure. But honestly, once I’m in my village and I see what I’ll be doing for the next two years, I will have to re-evaluate. Not just because of my relationship, but because I want to make sure that the work I’ll be doing is significant and helpful and that I can be accepted into the community. They actually recommend that you take time at the one year mark to make sure that you can be successful where you are for another year. So in March I’ll decide if I’ll stay the entire time or if I’ll come back in the summer. There’s really no way to know for sure until I’ve been at post for several months.

On a happier note, it’s really freaky and cool to meet the people whose blogs I’ve been reading for a year. I sort of feel like they are celebrities or something. I wonder if anyone will feel that way about my little old blog someday?

I’ve been reading “Where there is no Doctor” and it’s pretty interesting. My goal is still to assist with a birth and actually catch a baby being born. We’ll see, I have a long time to go before I’m at that point. I’m just making it day to day...and I am so happy that I can just relax today and not worry about getting to school on time. I think it’s worth it even if I have to run to the bathroom every hour.

Well, i think I’ll be able to post this on Tuesday at Songhai. A bientot,
Elaina

July 26th, 1:32pm CST/19:32 temps de Beninois, Porto Novo

Well. The stomach problems persisted until today. I almost wasn’t sure I could make it to school...but fortunately I’ve had no issues since this morning. That’s one thing about Peace Corps Benin I’ve noticed—everyone pretty casually discusses their poop situation. It’s pretty hilarious now that I think about it. I’ve tried to be relatively vague on here, but digestion is definitely a hot topic of discussion among the volunteers and trainees!

Today for lunch I mange’d an avocado sandwich (ok, so I’m leaving the word “mange’d” just to indicate the weird level of ‘franglais’ that I’ve been thinking in. Manger is the word “to eat” and I actually forgot the word ‘avocado’ just now and could only remember the french word ‘avocat’. It’s a weird state of being, actually. Hmm.) Anyway, it was tres bien with lettuce and onions and vinaigrette on a demi-pain (half of a huge baguette). It sat ok in my stomach and then I pris (see I did it again! Pris is the past participle of prendre. Prendre means “to take” or “to get”), I got some “fanmilk” which is the closest thing to ice-cream here. I got the yogurt version because with my tummy trouble I thought adding a bunch of lactose would be a bad idea (and yogurt has the enzymes to break down lactose and has not ever been a problem for me). It was soooo good, but definitely tasted very yogurty. But it’s better for my stomach than the regular one. But anyway, these fanmilk guys go around with their super cold trunk on a bike and honk this very distinctive horn. It’s a lot like the ice cream truck guy in the US. It’s super cheap and they always have petite monnaie (change for big bills, which is a bitch to find here).

Today we were at Songhai and for the first time I chose to hang out with some other stagaiers instead of stay there and get on the internet. I know I am going tomorrow, so it’s okay, but I feel a little bad because I told Colt I’d be on so we could skype chat or something and save him some money since it’s so expensive to call. But I gave him a ring and told him I wasn’t going and he was totes still sleeping, so I don’t think he minded waiting until tomorrow. I went to the marche (“mar-SHAY”...I can’t figure out accents with this computer grrrr) with Heather and Craig (the Wiricks from now on when I’m talking about both of them haha). It was just a short walk from Songhai and it was a freaking crazy place! Many many people selling lots and lots of stuff! There is a lot of cheap plastic stuff in the stalls and they will try to overcharge the yovos like mad. Heather wanted a powercord, but we couldn’t find any which is a lot different than the marche in Cotonou where there seemed to be power cords in every stall! I am on the lookout for a nice coin purse to keep my money, but I haven’t found anything besides cheap plastic ones. I want something that will last...so I’d be willing to pay like a mille franc for one. Which..is like $2, but it feels more like $10 to me at this point! I’m doing really well with understanding the money, a lot better than some of the other volunteers it seems. It’s very intuitive for me and I don’t have to think of it in US dollars at all at this point. I know what a decent price for most stuff is, but I’m definitely still learning. Heather tried to haggle down the price of clothespins, but was unsuccessful and it’s hard for us to know if that’s because we’re yovos or because the seemingly high price is just actually a reasonable price.

Related to les prix, I had my first major transaction today. I called over and got my first zemi on my own! I asked how much it would be and that my maison was a cote d’ecole Davie (next to the school Davie—“Dah-vee-ay”) and he said yes and that it would be 2 hundred franc. So, me, surprised that he gave the legitimate price right off the bat, said “ok” and hopped on. Well....we drove about 5 minutes and he stops and says “voila...xavier.” And I’m like “Non non non, DAVIE, pas XAVIER” and he’s like “OOOOHHH, DAAAVIE, ok” and we keep going, but I’m thinking “he’s going to charge me a lot more, but deux cents francs is the correct price”. I know what I’ve been taught, too, so when we finally stop and he asks for 500F I know he is trying to swindle me. So I said “You said ‘2 hundred’ so I am going to give you 2 hundred.” And he’s all pissed and tries to get more out of me and I say, “I KNOW the price, I live in Porto Novo. I will give you 2 hundred.” And he acts all grumpy while I get my money out and I throw in a 50F piece with it and he smiles and thanks me and I thank him back. So I paid a little bit more, but to be fair, he WAS confused about what I had said...but that generosity was definitely not going to get me to pay over twice as much as I KNOW the route really is. But yeah, that whole thing made me feel super bad ass. I totes did it all by myself. Woo hoo!

I recounted the story to my host family when I came inside, but before I could finish, the war hit! Ricardo, my host brother of 12 ans, and my host sis, Genevieve, 13 ans, totally started physically beating the shit out of each other in the other room. Another one of my host sisters, an older one who I don’t think always lives there, but sometimes does, jumped up to separate them and Amelie came over and chatted casually with me about the zemi thing! We left the room and I said I was going to take a shower, so I went outside to the well (la puis I think is the word) to get my water. While I was outside, Ricardo came out and said “bonsoir Elaina” all sweet, and walked by me to the back of the yard. I smiled and kept drawing out the water and when he came back by to go back inside he smiled back as he sauntered by, carrying this huge metal two by four. A minute or so later I finished up and followed, and came in to find the older sister, Genevieve, and Rico all entangled up with the two by four and some wooden implement of Gene’s, the older sister’s pagne (wrap around skirt) was totally falling off of her as they battled down the hall. Amelie came up to me and was cracking up. She said “ils se battent!” which means, interestingly “they are battling!” and I just nodded. After a bit, they calmed down and separated and I asked her if it was normal and she sort of laughed and said “that’s Ricardo!” She also told me that he had disrespected his sister and she got mad...but I didn’t really understand exactly what had gone down. But it was pretty wild. I called Rico over and asked him if he was not happy. He said he was “fache” which means “angry” and I said that sisters can be difficult. He agreed and I told him I understood because I had 5 brothers back home. He just sighed and when I asked if he would be okay he just nodded and said “ouais” (like saying “yeah” instead of “yes”). It was pretty trippy. Hitting in this culture is pretty commonplace, especially in the home, but I’m glad the big sister tried to stop it at least. Even if it’s normal for parents to beat their kids (frappe les enfants), it’s not good for brother and sister to wail on each other. Anyway, it was pretty wild. I can hear them all talking very animatedly now and Papa is home and he does not sound too happy about it lol.

Well, that’s it for now. I’ll definitely be online tomorrow evening when we finish up at Songhai. I think i’ll be on for probably an hour at least, so i can update the blog and do the facebook thing. Maybe I’ll even have time to check my email! It hasn’t been working lately because I need to change it to HTML or something...hopefully I’ll get that taken care of tomorrow, but if you’ve sent me emails and I haven’t responded, that’s why! Facebook message me for now and I’ll let you know when gmail is working for me!

Oh and I decorated ma cas (my moto helmet) and everyone thinks it looks banging. I will get a photo of it before it fades. My photo situation is pretty lame right now...I’ve taken...zero photos of Africa haha. I’m just so overwhelmed so much of the time and it’s impolite here to take photos without getting peoples permission first, so that’s kind of limiting...also it takes like an hour to upload 5 pictures, so I’m not sure it’s going to work anyway. I think I might ask people to send me memory cards and I’ll just take the pictures and then send the memory cards back and Colt can put them up for me or something. We’ll see what works best. Also, I can’t find the flash drive that I stole from my puppy...which really just seems like karma to me.

I LOVE AND MISS YOU ALL. CALL ME SOMETIME OR SEND ME A LETTER!

A tout a l’heure,
E